A Wanderer Angel

I am still unable to comprehend what she saw in me. Perhaps it is the fact that no woman, but my beloved mother, had ever showed this type of kindness towards me. Her smile would always be there to admire. The way she would demonstrate her kindness to me would fill me with hope and desires. Of course her kindness would sometimes appear strange to me because of the lack of experience in myself, every time she placed her arms around me my heart would beat like a loud drum.
It was not uncomfortableness what separated me from reaching a unique relation with her. Maybe the shyness and the insecurity that surrounded me at that time are the ones to blame. I never saw her again. I could never contemplate her pale and shy face again. My eyes were never able to connect with hers anymore.
Multiple sensations surrounded me entirely. I saw regret in my dreams. Sadness and sorrow were in every corner. I could feel the invisible tears dropping by my flesh. I had my opportunity to live and I let it drowned.
Today I see her, happy. A hopeful woman with no doubt. She has faced tragedies just like everyone else but that hasn't stop her from reaching her dreams. Although my presence is no longer needed, I want to see her overcome all those challenges that would eventually reach her in life.
It is unclear whether I will be allowed to have another opportunity like the one I wasted. One thing is for sure, I will not let it drown on that day.