Short Rambles

How to Take Incredible pictures of your Friends

1. First off dont use a real camera. Use a camera phone.

"Whoa! 3 or more people I know are eating food in a restaurant! This indredibly unique experience cannot pass us by without a group photo!"

2. Then ask everyone to stand up and smile at nothing.

3. Now, mess with your camera, not once, not twice but eight times.

"Hang on for just one more second... Keep side-hugging and sweating on each other while I change some settings."

4. Don't count to three.

Dont tell them to say cheese

5. And whatever you do, DO NOT make any attempt to steady the camera.

Keeping the camera shaky will result in a blurry effect that makes the photography appear to have been taken while riding inside of a fighter jet.

And fighter jets are exciting!

6. Disable the flash.

Everyone knows that the flash is only useful when you're deep beneath the earth taking pictures of undersea caverns, so be sure to disable it regardless of light conditions.

This guarantees that everyone in the photo looks like blotchy red-faced mutant pork people.

7. Holy snickerdoodles!

Younforgot to include yourself in this incredible photo. Be sure to snag some poor waiter and start again at Step #1so you too can be part of the magic.

8. Facebook that crap!

Upload and tag that one photo where you look great and everyone else looks like inbred barbarians.

And remember folks:

Life isnt about having amazing experiences;

Its about making mediocre experiences look Awesome on Facebook!