Worlds Most Terrible Fan Fictions

Girl Wonder And Further LOGIC

Authors Note: hey kids! Do you like Mary Sues?

You don't?...

Well tough freakin' luck, because I just got chapter two.

Have fun!

(I edit nothing. But I do put in little comments in brackets.)

• Our 1-month-old heroine Samantha was abandoned by her parents in a forest. Having read the first part of the story, no one blames them.

• Sam learned to talk, walk, fight and eat raw deer before she was a month old.

• She looks like a 5 years old for no discernable reason.

• She was bitten by an extinct tiger, which had no consequences whatsoever.

• She was found by Damian Wayne and Stephanie Brown, who took her to an orphanage for kids with powers people who were too annoying to be useful to society.

• A group called The Hood tried to kill her -- on principle, mostly, it seems -- but she beat them all up and Batman was impressed. Batman asks Sam -- who looks like a 5-year-old -- to be his partner; Sam says no. Note: She is 3 mos.-old month when this happens.

• Sam transforms into a 15-year-old body, puts on a shirt with a Superman logo, and goes out to fight crime as "Girl Wonder"

• Oh, she also somehow found and broke into the Batcave and stole Batman's stuff; when Batman asks for it back, she says no. Batman pouts.

• Still, Batman and the Justice League are so impressed with her crime-fighting skills they let her join.

• Eventually, The Hood kidnaps her and somehow this results in Sam hanging out with Joker and telling Batman he sucks.

• When Sam turns 4, she gets kidnapped by The Hand again (this happens a lot) and dies so all the men in her life feel bad. She rises from her grave five days later, like a Jesus who couldn't stop hitting the snooze button.

• Sam decides to quit the Justice League and be homeless for several years. Eventually, at the age of 5, she watches a "dolphin show" at a mall with Aquaman and Aqualad.

• Last but not least, at the age of 8, she arrives at the circus where Dick Grayson and his acrobat parents work. Having found her sleeping under the bleachers like a hobo and having watched her eat a raw steak, Dick fals instantly and helplessly in love with her. It's disgusting.

• But alas! A criminal named Zucko has arrived at the circus, a criminal that Sam had gotten arrested in her misspent homeless years.

WE BEGIN WHERE THE FIRST CHAPTER LEFT OFF

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dick smiled and ran out of the trailer. 'Come on guys!' He said to his parents who followed out soon after him. They all ran into the tent where they preform and looked around for Sam. Dick called out for her a couple times till she replied, sounding scared 'D-Dick~' Zucko walked out of the shadow's, with his men, who, one of them, had his arm around sam's neck, who was bloodied up and beaten badly.

(AN: Oh sure, ok. She can beat up gangs and criminals as a toddler, but can't deal with these guys...)

Dick and his parents gasped when they saw the men and Sam, his parents moving Dick behind him. Dick looked at Sam, and noticed how much pain she was in, and that she was crying.

He had to make them let her go, he thought. "Let her go!"

(AN: great plan. Dick.)

Dick yelled as two more of Zucko's men went and grabbed his parents from behind leaving Dick standing there by himself. Zucko saw the scared look on Dick"s face and walked over to him, pointing a gun to his forehead. Sam saw this and screamed crying more, "No!" She screamed. Zucko looked at Sam and walked over to her, pointing the gun to her forehead. "What? Would you rather die instead?" Zucko asked her as Batman jumped in through the roof.