Big idiot [NaLu]

5: Confusion

A new chapter! Finally! Seriously, how long was it since I last updated.... It most be about two months or something. Sorry, I'm a terrible person. I don't have any excuses for not updating. I'm just a lazy butt trying to write a fanfiction. And when we already are in the "terrible person zone", when I finally update this amazing story nothing happens. NOTHING!  This chapter is so boring! I cry just looking at it. I try to update soon again, no promises. And I want to thank you all for voting and all the comments. It makes me REALLY happy! I could literally run a marathon with all that happiness ( let me have my dreams ) Moving on to the chapter I hope you enjoy it!

And also, if you're from Sweden or can speak Swedish for any other weird reason go check out my one-chapter new year book.

Breath, slowly in and out. My sight are blurry of all crying. I had calmed down now. Right foot. Breath. Stand up, smile. I looked backed at the little person in the mirror. It was a girl, her hair was blond and it was a mess. Her eyes was red and puffy, you could still se were her tears had fallen. She looked sad but she stilled try to smile, but it never reached her eyes. Her usually lively brown eyes didn't seem to bright up as usual, they were now sad and dull. I don't know who the girl looking back at me in the mirror is. Left foot. One more step. Right foot. Repeat. I reached my destination and splashed some cold water in my face. My small bathroom had only a toilet, shower and a sink with another mirror. There is a painting on the left wall, all the colors painted on the square object looked nicely in the all white room. I look up to se the girl again. The smaller mirror still showed me someone else. I tried to smile. I look more like my self now. The Lucy Heartfilia everyone knows. Slightly better I treys to keep the good thoughts in my mind. I tried to brush my hair..... I gave up. What have I done to make my hair like this? In the end I just walked past to my bed. I stopped in front of it, I really didn't want to sleep. The bed always look so warm and welcoming with the pink sheets. I love to sleep, but my head slowly turns to my kitchen. You can se it from over hear were I'm standing. I slowly look at the coffee I bought a few days ago, it was half of it left. Slowly taking my eyes of the coffee I really wanted. Really! My eyes moved on, and they stopped at my tiny fridge. And somehow seconds later I saw my hand rest on the handle I opened the fridge (A/N: wait... Is it freezer... I always mix them up! Do you keep ice cream in the fridge. Or am I just making stuff up. Is freezer a word?...

Okey so I checked it up and it should be fridge, but you cant trust google translate.)

In the end, I got my coffee and Netflix, and I added in some ice cream to.

(A/N: Well, on second thoughts the ice cream should not be in the fridge... It should be in the freezer. Don't keep ice cream in the fridge.)

~Time skip~

I looked out the window. Is the sun already rising? I moved slightly to a better position. The ice cream was no more and I didn't feel tired at all, understandable if you think of all the coffee I drank. I looked around to find any thing that could tell me how much the clock was. But on second thought I didn't bother, I didn't want to know. My eyes where still staring out the window with the sun blinding my sight. I don't know how long I sat in that pose looking at the sun but after a while my eyes started to tear up. I closed my eyes in an attempt to give my sight back. I forgot to close them and now it stings. Rubbing my eyes as a tear slowly rolled down my cheek I yawn. My mood is all better, actually I feel like I have no troubles at all. Not even one in the whole world. I stood up and walked with tired steps across the rom to the bright window, I pull the curtains to cover the room from the bright sun. Much better.

The next hours was a combination of looking at my phone, sleep and try to sleep. I didn't know if it was day or night anymore but to not have I single worry in the world, every thing felt great. After the third time looking for new updates on any social media I put my phone away. I closed my heavy eyelids and didn't wake app before my phone started to ring in my ears. I groaned at the sound not willing to move. Maybe, if I lay just still it would stop. Maybe, if I didn't move an inch I could still pretend to be asleep. Maybe, if I don't breath everyone will think I'm dead and I don't have to do what my phone tell me to do. To walk to school. Im not one of the persons who hate school. I'm one of the persons who hate mornings. And you know what I'm talking about. Don't pretend to be all goodie goodie. EVERY morning when your alarm go and you know you have to go up but still you pretend not to hear it so you can sleep a little bit longer. Even if you know in the end, you have to go out of your warm bed anyway and now you don't have time for anything else than eat a quick breakfast, brush your teeth and other important stuff. And you scold your self for not going out of bed earlier. (A/N: that's how I wake up every school day. -_- )