Denial

forever and always

"I...I don't need you're fucking help, okay. I'm a grown man" his voice became deep and his words slurred.

"Daniel stop. I'm trying to help you" I said softly

"I don't need you're help woman!" He yelled and swung his large hand across my face making me loose balance and fall to the ground.
He chuckled and walked away, loosing his balance in the process.

I sat on the floor crying. Thinking to myself why am I still with him? Why do I care so much? Why won't my dumb heart forget about his non-existent one?

All these things flowing through my mind made me hate myself for being so vulnerable. My mind just keeps saying it'll get better. And I keep believing myself. Why? I don't know.

*******

"Good morning baby" Daniel said grabbing my ass

"Don't touch me" I snapped, slapping his hand away

"Whats wrong babe?"

"Don't babe me Daniel. I'm tired of you're shit okay, I'm tired of you getting drunk and being abusive. I don't deserve this shit Danny! I don't!" By now I was crying. He sat beside me and wrapped his arm around me
"I know baby and I'm sorry. I drink because every time we go out, there is a a lot of guys looking at you. Sometimes I feel like one of them are gonna steal you. I see the way you smile with other guys, that smile doesn't  appear with me..so I drink...and drink until I can't feel anything"

he started crying and I felt bad for everything I just said. Him slapping me doesn't matter right now, the only thing that matters is me and him getting back on track.

*******

"Seriously Anna, you need to dump him"

"Don't you think I know that Gabe?

"He's telling the truth" dessy chimed in

"Yeah. Thanks des"

"Did you at least talk to him?" Gabe asked annoyed

"He..he uh, started crying..so no"

"Oh my god ann! Thats the classic act. Crying and begging for forgiveness!"

"Des, please stop. I don-"

"Honestly Anna, call me when you're ready to stop being so fucking denial"

Des got up and walked out the café we we're eating at. Gabe looked at me and sighed getting up and following des. Guess I just lost both my best friends