Kelly Beth

19 lives to live and 1 to know

19 people died at my hands... 8 women, 6 men,and 5 teens under 16... I could go as far as to tell you their exact names,security codes,passwords,websites visited ever,religious beliefs,fetishes, their entire lives leading up to that day and even their health.

A week and 3 days in coma stasis I lived each of their lives one at a time. Not fast forwarded just so you know,but it wasn't every bit of their lives but I have every bit of it even tracing back to their births and first memories inside the womb of their mother.

I watched and felt everything some moments I wanted to stop from happening but I couldn't change anything just watch and feel What I walked trough with them all with, or more like I was in their shoes.It was traumatic experiences,Painful memories,exciting moments, basically any strong emotionally attached memories they had I went trough it as though it was important I see it,felt it... 

What they all had in common though was the fearful memory of me killing them.I had to look at myself 19 times kill each one of them all the while wearing that wicked smile on my face doing so. I saw myself force myself or rather person whose memory I was seeing, feeling, to shoot themselves or the attackers around me some of them I placed my hand on and caused their brain to explode internally and I felt the pain of every last victim... I died 19 times... 

When I had opened my eyes after all this was over I wasn't quite sure who I was for a while I was speaking Russian without realizing it as though I had know it all my life, Telling doctors I didn't want the money anymore let me go home to my семья,У меня большая семья. which means family, I have a big family...ahlyekSAHNDR or Alexander was someone who I killed before one of the 6 men. I woke up thinking I was him for about 15 minutes before Kelly walked in the room. From the moment I saw her face I remembered who I was. 

She began to calm me down and help me focus past the constant pulses of headaches and the different languages I was speaking in. She never gave me a name she always called me handsome and told me that my name should always be my choice when I am ready. Can you imagine a woman holding a traumatized, confused, and on the verge of going insane boy calling him handsome and calming him down? worked for me. 

In my head I was fighting for my own body it seemed. Eventually I got my bearings after about an hour while being smothered in the arms of Kelly who was telling me constantly that it was OK. 

After a series of test and medication it was determined that I was back to health and was allowed to be on my own in my room again while on medication. While I was laying in my room 3 days after neglecting to take my medication while I was asleep I began to have dreams of a beach and a family, Three kids, two boys and 1 girl, A mother too she was a beautiful blonde and I as the father a Bob as she called me. I know he wasn't one of my victims but I have no idea who he was and why I was dreaming his memories. 

I did feel at peace though sitting there on the beach kids running around wife in my arms. Suddenly I saw my wife I mean his wife turn and scream out in fear "Kelly?!" Bob wheres Kelly? emotions of fear drowned me as they both searched frantically for her. 

I didn't even notice the littlest child was a little red head girl and then without warning  I heard a gunshot go off and I woke up. What  a nightmare wasn't exactly what came to mind at first considering my view when I woke up was that of an alley way and a cardboard box over my head not the four walls of my room so I didn't think my dream was over but the reality of the hot air flowing trough my lungs along with the scent of what I assume to be a gutter or garbage nearby gave me doubts. I frantically started looking around wondering what the fudge was going on? was I in some other test? I had hoped that was what it was but unfortunately when I caught a glimpse of my reflection in a building window across the street  I wasn't even me anymore I wasn't even 16 I was some homeless old guy with grayed out beard and  graying red hair probably in like my 50's. 

You know that feeling you get when you just got a new phone or computer and you accidentally spilled water on it? Yea I was freaking out like that saying" no.. no no no no what?, what in the hell?"I kept pacing back and forth checking my reflection hoping it would magically change back to Mr. Handsome right before my eyes. Everything was scaring the hell out of me, the sound of my voice,the way I smelt, the arthritis in my left knee,the strange voices in my head and out of all those things that last one became my focus because at first I was thinking this guy had some mental health issues too but when I listened to that voice it was him speaking to me. Shouting why he couldn't move his own body and I was talking back to him too out loud saying I don't know, I don't know what the hell is going on. 

Who are you was the question that made some pieces of the puzzle fall in place when he answered me shouting  clearly I am Bob Beth!! get out of my body!!!... To be continued.....