January 25, 2016
When we first started dating
I thought it was weird that you liked being the little spoon.
In hindsight, I realize
It's my favorite thing.
I was so used to having someone behind me
That it felt strange to my body holding you that way.
But now I miss how the warmth
From your skin radiated onto my breasts,
Across my stomach,
And down my thighs.
I had never felt more connected to someone until those nights.
And now it's hard
Knowing that I'll never feel you there again.
You'll never reach back
To hold my hand while you're sleeping again.
Never again will I be able to lightly run my fingers across your stomach,
Chest,
And arms
The way you love.
You're gone
But I can still feel your ghost
At night,
Haunting my aching,
Longing body
And mind.
-c.m.w
January 27, 2016
I can't bring myself to delete the pictures
Of you holding me
Of us being happy
When things were good
It's just too hard
And too much to handle.
I miss your smile
And the memories we made.
I miss how happy we were.
It's so bitter sweet.
February 25, 2016
Today was just a nightmare,
A bad dream.
I hope that in the morning
I'll wake up and everything is okay.
I'll tell you all about my crazy, scary dream,
And you'll tell me,
"It's okay. I would never do that to you because I love you."
And we'll go about our day
And be happy again.
February 27, 2016
You made me a sunrise person
To anyone else, that would sound beautiful
Like you made my life
Worth waking up for in the morning.
But the sunset was my favorite,
The most beautiful thing in my life
Other than you
And now you've taken that too.
How could you?
There's nothing beautiful or poetic
To say about what you did
You shattered my fucking heart.
