I don't know, why I was thinking about it now, in a cab on the way home, raindrops trailing down the window. Maybe it was because of the song, or the weather, but my thoughts went to my Ex-bestfriend. You'll may think it's a girl, but it's not. My former BF was a boy. I knew him since we were little, he was some kind of childhood friend. He's one year older than me, so we weren't in the same class at first wenn we went to elemantary school. But because of some circumstances I could skip first grade and came in the same class as him. We weren't best friends from the very beginning, no, when we were in 5th or 6th grade we started to spend time together. And another thing that was different from other boys: he was my first crush, too. As I thought, he rejected me, (we were in 4th grade) but we remained as friends.
Together with his and my other BF we spend every break.
But nothing lasts forever, junior high came, and sadly (but predictable) we weren't in the same class. I tried everything to get him into mine, it didn't worked. We tried to keep in touch, it worked just fine - at first. He quickly found new friends and distanced himself from me. Whenever I talked to him, he insulted me or, even worse, ignored me. I act all cool and said to my friends things like "That lil' bastard" or "I hate him.". They believed me, and together with them I tried to just forget him. It was true, I was angry at him. But not as half as how sad and hurt I was about his actions.
Even now, I don't get my real feelings for him, but at least I could say it. I didn't say a word to my friends. They don't know, what you, a total stranger, knows now.
Sorry, I just had to write it, or I would've went crazy.
