The Pain That Comes With You

.1.

~December~

She knew that I liked him, And the worst part about all of this is that, he knew.

~one week earlier~

"I still like him," I mouthed to Dakota in the middle of math.

"OMG REALLY," Dakota mouthed back looking really excited.

I could tell she didn't mean it. When she talks to me, she never means it. But this time, something was different.

~six days later~

Sunday, January 10, 2:35pm Dakota (@dacokamaan) i need to tell you something. like tomorrow.

Sunday, January 10, 2:47pm December (@llammacornsie) ok. what time do you get to school?

Sunday, January 10, 2:48pm Dakota (@dacokamaan) like 8:05

Sunday, January 10, 2:48pm December (@llammacornsie) ok

~earlier today~

"DECEMBER!!!!," Dakota practilly screamed from the other end of the hall.

"What did you need to tell me? Are you and Alex like a thing now?," I prayed to God that she would say they weren't a thing.

"How did you know?"

From this moment on, nothing would be the same, nothing.

I burst into tears running down the hall. And then it gets worse,  Alex stood right in front of me with the most worried face I have ever seen. It's like I'm falling into a never ending cycle of heart breaks. How could she do this to me? How could HE do this to me?

~present time~

"December, are you okay?," Alex asked me in math, still so worried.

I didn't respond

"December, please?"

Our math teacher Mr. Burgester doesn't like for us to interrupt the class asking to use the restroom, so we have to use sign language, which isn't a problem for me because I already know sign language.

I signed to Mr. Burgester asking to use the restroom. As soon as he said yes, I bursted into the hallway and outside til I got to my favorite spot to think, right behind the shed where the softball equipment is. Hoping that this was all just a bad dream.