I DO NOT PROMOTE SELF HARM THIS STORY IS BASED ON A TRUE STORY WITH LITTLE FICTION NAMES AND AGES HAVE BEEN CHANGED TO PROTECT THE IDENTITYS OF THOSE INVOLVED
Characters;
Main charecter- Alexandria a 18 year old living with her best friend.
Zedrik; Alexandrias best friend.
My eyes opened as i saw him in front of me.
"Good morning gorgeous" He said as my heart filled with joy.
I covered back up so he wouldn't see my wounds.
"Whats wrong" He says. Just like every day. I mean we have lived together for 3 years he knew when something was wrong.
"Oh nothing" The millionth time that lie has been told. I get up and change into a casual outfit.
I don't try around him there's no need to he already tells me everyday that i'm beautiful, gorgeous ect. But I wish he knew what really went on. Not a minute goes by without the voices screaming at me. Without my thoughts eating me alive. But I smile. and it works. He's happy because he thinks I am. and in reality thats all i could ever ask for. "Alexandria" he yelled from the kitchen. "Yes Zedrik?" I replied. "Egg sandwich he said handing me a plate giving me a kiss on the lips."you know I'm really attracted to you" hes says. "And I am too you" I say back smiling. I pull my sleeves down to my fingers. I can't continue like this. "But the thing is it would never work out." I was heart broken. My stomach dropped to my feet. All i could think was "why...why not... i love you." "Oh?" I said sounding perfectly fine. "I like you too much to loose you... I would date you ... I would love to call you mine. I just cant take that risk though" I finished my egg sandwich, gave him a kiss and walked out to my car. I usually go on drives every other day... As i took off i went to the abandon burial site a few blocks from our house. I popped open the glove compartment as i grab whats inside. I open the silver box to find my razors, knifes, pins, rags, band aids, and super glue. i sat there, i put in my favorite song, and i cried. with the shiny blade i rolled up my sleeve i had already had 6 gashes of good size across the bottom of my arm. "happy, happy suicide, my wrist is a violin" My song i would sing as i cut. to reassure they would be deep for each syllable a slice in the same spot. as i clean up and go home i feel dizzy, but i say nothing. I get out of the car and open the door, And there zedrick is crying.....
CHAPTER 2
He hugged me imeditlly as i walked through the door. "Whats wrong?" I ask. he pulled up my sleeves as my wounds were there. He told me to get into my bathing suit. he had already saw my cuts so why not. I stepped out of my room as my true self was exposed. My stomach, my hip bones, my thighs, shoulders, legs, arms, wrists, even my collar bones had cuts, or scars. He kissed every single one and i swore it took him 30 minutes to do it. "You're still beautiful to me" He says as he looks at me tears filling his eyes" i hugged him tight. " I love you Zedrik" i whispered
i love you too alex, he said as i started crying...
-later that night-
"movie night" Zedrik says, he looks so cute, his abs, the way he looks in basketball shorts, as i'm there with my baggy pants and tank top. We sat down, smoked a few bowls, drank a 5th or two, and took some pills. Its just what he did. We caused mayhem together, No we're not bad kids, we just do very very bad things for the people with shitty lives, we get nothing, while the people with good lives get everything, so we fight for it, weather its stealing or fucking our bodys up. We do it ... We started kissing, I was attracted to him so much, then ...from there ...was black.
CHAPTER 3
I opend my eyes.
"Fuck my head" i say . it's throbing. i look over to see zedrik in bed next to me. i look at him one more time to make sure... but he was naked....as was i, pill bottles, blunt wraps and alcohal bottles were scattered across the floor. "goodmorning gorgeous" I hear as i get a kiss on my forhead. "What happened last night??" I asked. "You were amazing thats what" ... What was he talking about? "amazing at what?" I honestly didn't know. "We ....ya know...we fucked." I hate the way he just bluntly put it out there. "Oh." That didn't hurt at all i thought. "But i do like you ...like alot...we're partners in crime. We do illigal shit together...plus we are like brother and sister....but we insest...we should do this more often by the way". it was alot to take in but anything to get closer to him. "Yeah of course" I smiled another fake smile... I love him..
