Constant.

Day One.

(N)

I honestly don't even know what I'm doing, writing a letter to you of all people. But honestly I can not help myself. Everything that I have bottled up inside, I want to tell you. Even if you are the reason that I feel the way I do at this very moment. You are still the one I want to run to after eight and a half hours of constant crying and the endless heartache. And this is only day one of it.

You don't want to talk and that's fine. You want your space and after what happened today, I should want mine too. But I want the opposite. I crave the exact opposite of what you want at this point in your life and that kills me inside. 

How can life be so cruel and hand two people a chance at love and happiness, then rip it away just when it got a little bit rocky? Who does that? 

You. Finn, you did that. And now I am at a loss of all coherent thought because all my mind is telling me is to follow what I feel in my heart. And my heart is screaming at me to fight for you.

And this is just day one.