Harry was done with this. Done hiding. Lying. He finally snapped, he picked up the blade, so accustomed to that cold, smooth medal, and slid it across his wrist... He had to do something. Something to feel. He hasn't felt in nearly three years. You see, for the past three years Harry has been hiding, all because he fell in love with his best friend, Louis William Tomlinson...
As he sat there, watching. Watching the blood run down his arm, memories of when he and Louis could just be together without any worries flashed through his mind. He was tired of hiding from the world, so many nights he dreamt of just grabbing Louis in the middle of the stage and kissing him, letting the truth come out...but he knew it would ruin his and the boys' career, he just couldn't do that to them.
Just as he was coming out of the memories, he heard the door close, "Harry! I'm home!....where are you babe?" Louis yelled, "shit! Louis can't see this, it'll devistate him!!" Harry thought. He cleaned up, what he could of the mess, put on his hoodie and ran downstairs. "Hey, sorry I was taking a uh nap!" Harry said pecking Lou on the cheek.
"Harry....why are you wearing a sweatshirt?" Louis asked, "It was really cold in here earlier, then I kinda fell asleep..." Harry said. Louis just gave him an understanding nod, Harry felt horrible lying to Louis like this, but it was for the best. Harry could feel the cuts against his sleeves, it hurt, but he liked it.
Louis knew something was wrong with Harry, he knew it was about him and Eleanor, but he HAD to "be with her" if they wanted to stay in the band, he had to. "Babe, are you alright? You seem upset," Louis softly asked. "Oh, uhm, yeah Lou, I'm fine....." Harry said, with a small smile. He was obviously lying. He was "fine", he was sick of hiding and crying...he just wanted the world to know about there love. He didn't wanna hide anymore...
"I know you hate me being with Eleanor, but you know I love you more than anything in the world. I've been waiting my whole life to find someone like you..." Louis said while he hugged Harry tight, "I know, Lou I love you, just please...don't ever let me go..." Harry said with a tear rolling down his cheek, "I won't" Louis said kissing Harry softly on the lips...
Harry had to tell Louis about what happen in the bathroom 20 minutes ago...he just couldn't find the words...
Grabbing Harry's hand, Louis took him over to the couch, "Lets watch a movie babe!" Louis said. "Alright" Harry replied. He sat on the couch as Louis put in "Love Actually", he came over and snuggled close to Harry.
About 10 minutes into the movie Harry fell asleep with Louis in his lap. Louis noticed and got up to use the bathroom. "OH MY GOD!!! HARRY!!!!!" Louis screamed from upstairs. Harry suddenly awoke, "fuck" he thought.
Harry ran up the stairs, he forgot the bloody towel on the floor and the blades were on the sink. "Shit, Lou..." Harry quietly said, "YOU SAID YOU WOULDN'T DO THIS ANYMORE! YOU SAID YOU'D STOP, FOR ME!!!" Louis screamed. "I DID IT BECAUSE I LOVE YOU! I DON'T WANNA HIDE ANYMORE LOU...i just want the world to know that your mine, and only mine..." Harry choked out the last part trying to hold back tears. Louis dropped the towel and walked over to hug Harry, he just hugged him. He didn't know what else to do. He knew they couldn't come out, or the band would be ruined..."Harry, please...don't do this anymore. I love you so much. I can't lose you..." Louis said with tears rolling down his cheeks, "I promise, I'll never do this again, I love you. Forever." Harry said but little did he know he was gonna break his promise....
All the boys had a day off today, well most of them. Louis had to go on a "date" with Eleanor, while Harry stayed at home waiting for him to get back.
It was 6:30 and Lou still wasn't home, "he left at 11," Harry thought. He wasn't allowed to call Louis when he was with Eleanor, so he just waited, and waited. He wanted to make this night special, so he ordered some food and had candles, he even got Louis favorite film, but by the time he got home, Harry was asleep. With the candles almost burnt out, and the food was almost cold. Louis saw Harry on the couch so he got a blanket and laid next to him. Tears started rolling down his cheeks, "I'm sorry Harry....I promise you, one day, we'll be free...I promise one day we won't have to hide. But until then, know that I love you, I always have, I always will," Louis whispered to sleeping Harry. Louis finally fell asleep...
