The Caregiver

ALL OF THIS IS GONNA BE ONE PART

  Suddenly I wake up, it's dark and cold, and I honestly don't know where I am or who I've become. My stomach aches of pain. I can't tell if it's from sickness or starvation. My mouth feels like the Sahara desert. I need water, food, and a blanket. All at once, a horrendous bang at, what I think is a door. "Wake up," a deep voice cries at me while turning the bright white light on. "I'm up," I utter sounding inhuman and weak. "Stand up, it's time for a shower," he howls at me. Only I can't stand up. "I said stand up," he says angrily. "I can't," I whine. He pulls me up by my weak, skinny arms. "Stop, that hurts," I scream. He lies me down next to the tub. The floor is cold, hard, and rough. He asks me why I can't stand up. I reply "I honestly don't know, sir. I don't know who I am, or where I am." He looks confused as if I did something wrong or insulted him in some sort of way. "Can you sit up," he asks concerned, yet obnoxiously. I tried and failed. "Where am I? What have I done to be here? Who am I? Who are you," I question the mysterious, but oddly handsome guy. "You honestly don't know, do you," he calmly replys. I look at him and shake my head no. "I'm Adam, you're in an insane asylum. You tried to kill some people while you were asleep. You are 17, and have been here for two years. I'm your caregiver for the time being, I have been taking care of you ever since you've been admitted. I'm very sorry for dragging you in here. I just get frustrated because some people try to say they can't walk, but really can. I am in no place to try and hurt you," he explains. "How old are you," I ask curiously. "I'm 19, why," he says with a mischievous grin. I smile and shake my head implying that I mean nothing.
I've taken my bath with a little help from the nurse. Adam came in after the nurse helped me get my tank top and shorts on. "What did you say my name was," I ask again. "I haven't told you yet," he says while helping me get my white and grey t-shirt on. Why wouldn't he tell me my name, I wonder. Do I go crazy when hearing my name being called? "Why can't I know my name," I ask furiously. "It has been a request from your parents not to tell you anything about them or you other than your age," he explains with a glum facial expression. "Why not," I inquire while tearing up a little. He grabbed my hand explaining all of my conditions and told me after I went delirious my parents gave me up for adoption. He informed me he told them to keep me until I'm 18 and stable enough for the real world. "This is the first time in 10 months you've said anything at all," he advised me. "When is my birthday," I say softly. "September 19th," he says wiping the tears off of my face and picking me up to put me in bed. "What's today's date," I directed. "June 5th. It's time for your lunch. I'll be back," he stated and walked out. Out of all this information I still ponder on what my name might possibly be. What did he say when he attempted to wake me up? Nothing. He just told me to wake up. I wish I could just get up and walk. He left the door wide open. I hear footsteps, "Oh good, you're back," I say, but when I look up it's not Adam. "I'm here to give you your medication," says the teenage looking girl. I don't think she's old enough to be the nurse, so I just stare blankly at her. Adam walks in as she's about to give me my medication. "Linda, stop," he yells while setting down my lunch to take the medication out of her hands, "you're not a nurse, so stop trying to kill the other patients. Go back to your room, or you'll be issued with a straight jacket." Linda stomps out leaving the rest of the fake medicine with Adam and me. "If anyone that's not wearing a light green scrubs outfit attempts to give you any kind of medication, do not take it," he states disappointed. I nod as he begins to feed me a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. "Why do you want to take care of me, I'm a crazy person. I tried to kill someone," I mention in grief, "when I was admitted you were only 17, you couldn't have possibly been old enough to work here. Don't you have to go to college to work here, legally anyways?" He looks at me, smiles, and tells me, "I am your boyfriend. I have been for four years. I couldn't leave you. I love you." I don't know what I say, so I just take my sandwich away from him and eat it. "Kayla," he says while holding one of my hands, "your name is Kayla."
As I finish my sandwich, Adam leaves the room to tell the nurses it's time for my medicine. Kayla. My name is Kayla. It's pretty. Why couldn't I know my name? I seem fine. I'm not going crazy. I like my name. Adam returns with my medicine and explains the blue one is trazodone ,which is for depression, the green one is dextroamphetamine, which is for my ADHD, and the yellow one is fluoxetine, which is for my anorexia. "Why couldn't I know my name," I ask while putting the medicine in my mouth. "You're parents just didn't want you know anything about your past life. They wanted you to start over with a fresh start, which includes new parents and a new name apparently," he said sternly. "Adam," I say nervously, "can you stay in here with me tonight?" He looks at me, grins, and kisses my forehead, "of course," he whispered.
Morning came, Adam and I were lying in a twin bed with two blankets and four pillows in between us. All of a sudden, Adam peaks over the pillows to see if I was awake. "Kayla," he whispered, "you awake?" I roll over, he smiles and says "I guess so," then laughs. "Is there any way I could get a bigger bed," I ask. He said he'd ask a nurse if I could. This bed is hard and springy. My back aches from it. Adam comes back and shakes his head no. "Dang," I mutter softly. "Are you hungry," he concerningly asked. "Kinda," I say with a little shrug. "Okay, I'll go get us something to eat," he states as he walks out of my room. It's only been a day that I am able to remember things, and I found out I have a boyfriend, my name is Kayla, I have been put up for adoption, my birthday is September 19th, and I tried to kill someone. I'd say my life is pretty swell. Adam comes back with a plate with fruit, eggs, and bacon on it and a cup full of orange juice. "Thank you," I say politely. He nods and smiles. As we finish eating, the nurse walks in with my medication. "Kayla here are your medicines. I need to see you take them, so I can make note," states the nurse while handing me a little Dixie cup with three pills in it. I take the pills and smile at the nurse. She starts asking how I've been feeling since I started talking again and if it's hard for me to breathe when I talk. I tell her the truth, "I feel a whole lot better I guess, I don't know. I honestly don't know how I felt before I started talking again. I never knew I quit talking until Adam told me. No, it's not hard to breathe." She nods while typing all of this information in her iPad. She says thank you and exits my room. "Can you sit up yet," Adam asks concerningly. I try and succeed. "I did it, Adam," I yell with excitement. He smiles and says, "congratulations! You did it. Do you want to try standing up?" I nod while smiling. I try and fail. I fell plumb on my butt. "I can sit up, but not stand up. This makes no sense to me. I can feel everything. I just don't get it," I rant to Adam while crying. "It's okay, Kayla. I shouldn't have made you try to stand up just yet. We'll take it one step at a time," Adam states while helping me off of the floor.
Adam and I have been in this room for nearly five hours now. He hasn't left my side once. Other than to go get the nurses when I had to use the bathroom or needed an ibuprofen for my migraines. I just feel so bad for Adam. He's trying so hard to keep me happy, and I can't even stand up or do anything for him. "Adam," I ask nervously, "why have you stuck with all of this?" Adam looks at me with a crooked smile and replies, "Kayla, I can't leave you. You're the only person I have left." I'm scared to ask him what he means by that. Did his parents abandon him? Did his parents die? What happened? I'm so afraid to ask. "What do you mean, I'm the only person you have left," I ask sheepishly. "When you tried to kill someone, my parents said I couldn't visit you, so I started visiting you secretly. They saw me come in here one day, and told me to choose between you or them, and I chose you. I chose you because I don't think I'll ever meet someone as beautiful, funny, ironically crazy, sweet, and amazing as you." He chose me over his family. I wish I wasn't in this condition. I wish he would've chosen his family. I stare at him blankly. "What's wrong," he asks me. "It's just your family is more important than me. You should've chosen them," I say quietly. He just looks at me with an empty expression.
Several silent hours passed. Finally Adam fell asleep in the brown chair beside my bed. I fell asleep a few hours after that. Adam woke me up around three or four in the morning. "What's going on," I ask confusingly. "Let's go, we're leaving," he tells me while putting my stuff in a big blue bag. "Adam, I can't walk. you can't expect me to leave this institution, and I'm still crazy," I exclaimed. He looks at me and exits the room. I don't know why he thinks I'm going to be able to leave this institution without my medication, and I can't walk. He returns with a wheelchair, and tells me to sit in it. "Adam, I can't move my legs. I can only sit up. I can't move. What don't you get about that," I say while crying. He picked me up and put me in the wheelchair. He's wheeling me down the halls, and out of nowhere a nurse stops him, "Adam, what do you think you're doing with Haley," the nurse states. "Haley," I ask, "Adam, you said my name was Kayla. What's going on." I keep looking back and forth from the nurse to Adam back to the nurse. "Kayla, don't listen to her she's crazy," Adam says nervously. "Haley, I'm a nurse. I have your paperwork right here," she says while pulling out a birth certificate, my social security card, my high school education papers, and everything else. She has my whole life in her hands. She could just give it to me and I'd know everything. She hands me all of the paperwork, and all of this has been a lie.