Slowly, it slips down my throat. I don't regret it, I feel relieved that everything is finally going to be over. It's 3:47 am, and my mom is sleeping with a man she met last week. This is how it always goes- meet someone, sleep with them, ignore them. And she doesn't pay much attention to me, but that's not why I'm doing this. I only have about an hour left, so I'll make this quick.
Last year my dad left us. It was July 23rd, I saw him on the news in a security tape. But my mom turned it off before I could read anything. After that my life started to go down hill very badly. My mom became an alcoholic, then brought home a different person every week. Hangovers became the norm, once or twice there was even a broken vodka bottle on the bathroom floor. On a lighter note school was fun, a few times before I dropped out I forgot about the life I had at home.
About eight months later, one of the men she brought home turned out to be a drug dealer. He lives an hour away.
I decided today that I was done, that I wanted it all to be over. I went to him with $200 of my moms money and I am returning with two pills. One to take, the other to leave behind as evidence. This is the night I'm going to do it.
Yes, I'm committing suicide. No, I'm not going to tell you all the reasons why. Why not? Because I can hardly breath.
To everyone else, good luck.
-Charlie
