After Letters

The letter

"Dear I don't even know,

To avoid cliches, This is not a Goodbye letter. This is my After letter. If you're reading this that means I am now gone, to wherever we go when we leave this world. I never have believed in heaven or hell. I know that I am simply gone. Having done nothing amazing or extraordinary with this life, my memory will fade in a generation or two. Excepting this and moving on, I get to what this letter is really about. What happens After? Not what happens to me, but what happens to everyone in my life who still gave a shit. (Sorry about the cussing mom) Now of course there is the funeral. Please don't waste your money, cremate me and spread my ashes, I'd love to be........."

"Fuck." Tony sat at his desk the computer screen flashing in front of him. A knock echoed through his room and he quickly closed the computer and picked up a book. His mom opened the door in wearing sweats, and a large dirty shirt. She walked further in her black eye matched the darkening bruises on her forearms.

"Dinners ready hun." Her voice was low and scared.

"Be right down mom." Tony stood up and adjusted his sleeves. She let out a large sigh "Please tony hurry, you know how you father is about dinner together." Tony nodded and followed his mother down the hall to the dinner room, which at this point in the night was covered in beer cans. His father was at the head of the table in a nice dress shirt with the blue tie loosened, he was chugging his sixth beer of the night and had only been home a hour. "Son." His words were starting to slur as they always did at this point. His deep voice still commanded respect. Tony walked over taking the only other seat available, the seat to the right of his father. The large man stood up growling. His figure stood at six foot, with no fat to be seen. Raising his right hand, he punched tony straight in the jaw. Tony fell to the ground the chair falling next to him. Long ago tony learned that if he didn't cry out his father would stop sooner.

"Where the fuck are you manners!" His father kicked out hitting Tony in his stomach. "Get your ass up and get the drinks" Tony cringed as he stood, his legs shaking. He walked to the kitchen and got his dad another beer, him and his mother water. Tony walked back in, placing the beer in front of his dad, him and his mom made eye contact, she just shook her head and quickly looked down. He sat down and started to eat his macaroni wincing, his side was throbbing. In all likelihood his father's powerful kick most likely bruised a rib or even cracked it.

"How was school darling?" His mom spoke softly as if trying not to wake a bear. Not looking up from his food tony answered "It was fine mom, how was your day?"

"It was fine, worked around the house." She held her arm and spoke quietly. Tony nodded and then lowered his head to finish his meal. Once everyone was finished he cleaned up table and did the dishes before heading upstairs. With a plop he lowered himself gently onto his bed, his ribs ached and he knew he would have a bruise on his jaw by tomorrow. He pulled out his computer and started writing once more.

(continued from earlier)

"..I'd love to be spread in the cemetery near the willow tree. I've spent many years under that tree writing, and crying. Seems only fit that this is where my ashes are to remain. I have already given most of my stuff away, so no need to worry about that. Mom, I have an email with pictures, and videos of dads abuse. I will be hitting send right before I leave to take my life. He won't hurt you anymore. This I promise you. None of this is your fault. The man we all know today as my father, isn't who you married. People change, He's changed Mom."

          Tony felt hot tears flow down his face, He stood up saving his letter, then closing his computer. Stripping out of his clothes he looked down at the blue bruise that was forming on his side. With a sigh he turned off his lights, laid in bed, and closed his eyes.