breaking point ¬ levi's

2

{Levi}

I sat on my cold chair on my desk.
There were papers everywhere.

I need to clean.

I looked at my aching ankle. It was blue and purple. It was less swollen but it hurt every time I applied pressure on it.

Great now I have to stay low for a while.

Damn, this trip was exhausting all in the wrong ways.

I closed my eyes.

I'm tired.

I never felt like I needed sleep that much, but tonight, I fell asleep and slept the whole night.

'Knock! Knock!'

I opened my eyes. Was it already morning? I still had my dirty clothes from yesterday.

"Um, Who is it?"
The door opened, "Captain Levi,"
"You again."

It was Dieter, the soldier who didn't obeyed orders the day before.

"Um, Captain," he stopped, his eyes were already watering.

"Spit it, I have things to do," I said.
He was holding Petra's emblem in his hands, believing it was his friend's.

"Yes Captain. See, I know you gave me this," he showed me the emblem, "to make me feel better and it did. Even if I knew it didn't belong to Ivan. I guessed I was so determined to find his body, that I didn't think clearly, costing the lost of all the corpses we should've brought here. I guessed that emblem just showed me that we are all troubling with the death of someone and I was just selfish." He finished, sobbing silently.

"I'd like to give that back, I think you should have it, and thank you again for giving it to me. It really is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me."

He carefully dropped the emblem on my desk and saluted lamely, then left.

I found myself with a tear slowly longing my cheek then falling on my desk. The emblem, it was Petra's.

Since when did I cried tears of sadness.

Slowly, more tears came up and after a while it was unstoppable.

Even if I tell myself that nobody would have known what was going to happened, I always blame myself.

I learned long ago, that regretting only pulls you back. That's why I've stopped regretting and that made me, me. And it always worked so far. But now, I am not so sure if really, it only builds you up making it harder to destroy.

"DAMMIT!" I screamed sitting on my desk. Tears and tears came again. I muffled my sobs in my hand as my vision blurred out.

If really has to be like that? I hate days following excursions.

'Knock, knock!'

They really keep coming today eh.

"Levi? Is everything okay?"

That was Erwin's voice. He can't see me cry. Even if I've seen him cried, he can't know.

I swept my tears from my desk, and wiped my face.

"Levi?"

Shit! That was Hanji's voice. What were they doing here? What do they want?

"W-What?" I stuttered.

"Well, we heard you cursed. You okay?"

"Just fine."

"Can we enter?" Asked Hanji.

"Why?" I asked.

"To talk about what happened with Eren."

"And the female Titan!" Said Hanji with her usual positive, overwhelming attitude.

"Can't we do it later?" I tried to convinced them.

"No. We have a meeting."

I get up slowly, still limping and open the door.
"I'm listening," looking elsewhere, avoiding their eyes.
They looked at me like I had two heads.

"What brats?"

"You've been crying," she remarked.

•••My second chapter. Final chapter ongoing!
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This chapter also has been modified slightly for cringiness :) Thank you