Stood there in the rain, just looking in his eyes, and wondered why would he ever love me? He has a girlfriend and she is, well, better! I knew then it was time I let him go. I knew I couldn't have him forever, but I still wanted more time and precious memories with him. He finally broke the silence between us and said:
"I'm sorry...I didn't mean for this to happen ...I have to go, go back to where I belong"...
He didn't mean for this to happen? Was he implying he had feelings for me or did he know I had some for him? Still, he was right. He didn't belong here ...he doesn't belong with me ... That is what I had to understand but didn't really want to.
He grabbed my hand and I pulled away and yelled:
"You're right, you don't belong here! You have to go back to your better life with your girlfriend! You just made me feel special and important but it was all a joke!"
Thankfully I resisted a kiss. I knew I wanted it but I also knew I was gonna regret it. I thought he cared about me but he just lead me on.
"You are important and special! He argued, he took a second and rephrased. -You are important and special; don't let anyone tell u otherwise. But don't you understand I'm afraid... Afraid of making a wrong decision and screwing up!"
I looked at him hurt by his scar full words.
"I'm the wrong decision. I'm not worth it! I'm not worth anything to you! You have to go. Now."
I repeated it several times before he left, and he kept saying sorry...
But he left me in the rain, tears going down my cheeks and I broken hearted... I knew at that moment I couldn't trust anyone ever again.
