Starring at my food but I can not eat it,
Laying in my bed but I am not sleeping,
Crying in my room and I keep it top secret,
Because people tell me they care but they do not mean it
Im cut open even thought Iam not bleeding,
My heart is broken so imma make it stop beating,
Someone in the room and scream,
He's not breathing,
Rush to the hospital to have a doc treat it,
But he cannot beat it, there's no time at all,
Cause I just popped some pills with some Tylenol,
And 3 bottles of antidepressants and Zam Booka,
40 also got killed I didn't puke up, anything.
There's no use in pumping my stomach,
Cause I'll just do it again,
I'm a lost cause so fuck it.
Everyone with grudges towards me,
Is gonna love this.
Smiles on their faces when my death goes public
Cause I'm killing myself,
Takking matters to my own hands ...
I can't picture myself as a grown man...
I don't wanna grow up ...
I hate change and everything's just so ...
Rearranged.
My life is nothing but a dissaster ...
And time keeps going by faster ...
But in a second all that shit wont matter ...
Fuck this imma kill myself.
I got cocky.
But I wanna die, not gonna lie ...
Thoughts of suicide keep crossing ...
My mind on a regular basis ...
Going craz Cause I'm going trought bull shit ...
On a regular basis ...
Look me in the face, I'm I'sick in my eyes...
Cause I'm sick in the mind ...
I've been wishing to die ever since I was 9.
This isn't a lie ...
I don't bitch just to whine or
Bullshit just to rhyme about it.
I don't cry just to spit,
Just to try to quilt trip ...
Cause I could give two shits about your pity...
I ain't trying to get everyone to feel bad for me,
I'd rather dis everyone and make y'all mad at me ...
I ain't a happy person and I ain't that light.
Not even by myself.
I know I ain't that nice...
But people don't understand how much ...
I hate my life ...
Cause if they did they'd know how...
