The Bridge (Ereri/ Riren)

Chapter 1

Torment.

That's what my life was.

From the minute I was born into this shitty world, no one loved me. I was a screw up, a useless being that wandered the earth for no specific reason.

People say that we are born for great things, but that was false. I was a mistake. I was never supposed to happen.

My older sister Mikasa had been a planned child, and she spent her life happy and joyous.

I on the other hand, lived in hell.

No this isn't stupid self pity, me wallowing over my own shitty life and hoping that it would get better, it makes me sick to even think about it.

I hated how I looked, how I walked, how I spoke, how the color of my eyes looked like vomit.

I hated myself.

I hated how I was such a sensitive person. I hated how I fell for people that didn't love me back. I hated the fact that every single time I got close to someone, they would shatter my heart with a baseball bat known as 'reality.'

And that's why I'm standing here on this bridge now.

No, it wasn't the bullies or my heartless parents that were doing this to me. I was the one taking the final step, I was the one that had control over how I perceived things.

Let's say If I was holding a gun to my head at this very moment.

If I pulled the trigger, I was the one deciding that, not everyone else.

And that's why I'm deciding to pull the trigger.

I didn't have a gun, what a shame. It would have made this experience faster and less painful.

I looked at the rushing water below, knowing that these would be my last few breaths.

It was wired, knowing that in a few moments, there would be no, 'Eren Jaeger,' or, 'The fag in the back of the class,' I would be gone. Wiped away forever from this shit people call society.

I was going to miss Mikasa, that's for sure.

I wonder how she would take the news? Probably not very well, When she found out I was suicidal, she sent me to a therapist.

That didn't go well.

The women didn't care about my problems, the only thing she told me was, 'Next time, cut vertically.'

I'll take her advice now.

I rolled up my black sleeves, uncovering the faint little lines that  stained my pale skin. As I dug my razor blade from my pocket, I stopped for a moment.

Should I really do this?

Is it worth it?

What is it that I'm exactly fighting for anyways?

Nothing, absolutely nothing.

I had nothing to hold onto, nothing to grasp, there was nothing that could pull me out of the darkness known as depression.

I lifted up my arm, pressing my razor against the skin slowly, creating little red droplets that fell to my feet.

The park by the bridge was always so beautiful, even during summer storms and winter blizzards.

No matter how shitty my life got, the park was always there for me. Like a person of some sorts.

I sighed at my stupidity and pulled my razor blade back from the cut, only to stab it into my vein, making blood gush from the appendage.

I nearly smiled at the satisfaction from knowing that this would all be over in a few matter of minutes.

I switched the hand that I was holding the razor blade and stabbed the other vein.

The cold December wind blew through my hair, tossing it around gently.

After a few minutes, I felt the effects starting to happen, I was drowsy, and I felt lightheaded.

Unaware what I was doing at that point, I lifted the razor blade and slit my throat in one swift movement, feeling more blood drip from the cuts.

I stepped over the railing and took one last glance around me, taking in the beautiful surrounding of winter, before stepping forward.

And I fell, darkness engulfing me as soon as I hit the rivers rough current.

Levi~

I tightened my scarf around my face, the cold wind nipping at my skin.

I growled, clearly unamused by what the weather had decided for that particular day.

Of course, as soon as my car decided not to work, there was a fucking snow storm.

I sighed, knowing that complaining wouldn't help with the situation anymore, and I trudged farther down the park path.

When ever I walked to or from work, I took a short cut through the park. It was relaxing.

As I approached the bridge, I spotted something in the water, bobbing along with the steady current of the river.

I cringed in disgust, thinking that it was a dead fish.

Before I realized,

It was an arm.

At first I thought it was an arm without a body, but then I saw a brown mop of hair reach the surface.

Since the brunette hadn't been taken down stream, I was assuming that he must have fallen into the river recently.

I felt a sudden urge and I dropped my brief case and ripped off my coat and shoes.

This is stupid. This is stupid. This is- ah, fuck it.

I climbed over the railing, staring at the rough water below.

This is the most fucking dumbest idea I've ever had, he/ or she's probably dead already, and try couldn't have called off of the bridge, there was too high of a railing.

I took a deep breath before I leapt off the bridge, expecting to cold water to engulf me at any moment.