The Housekeeper

Better Put That Woman First

PART 1: Now, I realize that you need love too.

Prologue

Jalanda

This tired melodrama was beneath me. A man who I've loved for this long, just treats me like I'm nothing. I feel as if I'm trapped, trapped within myself. With no one to love me. No longer will I be a man's play thing. No longer will I sit here and endure the lies and heartache. So, I'll let this be known. I'm done being foolish. Enough is enough. It is time for a change. At the tender age of twenty-one, I thought Jerome was everything I dreamed of. Everything I thought a relationship was supposed to be.

I was wrong. So, so wrong. At first, he was nice, sweet, and charming. Then, everything took a turn for the worse. The arguing started. Then, the constant shade. Constantly badgering me, like I meant nothing to him. Jerome took it to the next level when he walked into the house smelling like cheap, beauty supply perfume. Lip stick smeared on his neck, and need I mention the retched smell of sex. At first, it would hurt my heart. But, I was legit tired. Just tired of trying, when I was the one giving ninety percent. But, Jerome was giving only the ten percent to the relationship.

Now, here we were, staring one another down like lion and its prey. Standing in the living room, I tracked back and forth, just continuing to stare at Jerome as he pushed everything off the table like he was crazy. "I can do what I damn well please! Chill out, that's the last time I'ma tell you, Jalanda!"

"So, sleeping around on me is cool!" I shouted, using my hand motions to express my feelings even more.

"Who gives a fuck! Yeah, I slept with shorty, B! There, is that what you wanted to here!"

My nose was flaring. My jaw was clenched as my fists were balled up so tight, I could strike him at any moment for what he just said. "Who do you think you are? I am not your flunky! You can get out of my house! All you do is sit on your behind like a couch potato. Matter of fact, you don't even have a job! Yet, somehow, you always come home smelling like drugs and beer! What happened to the man I use to know, huh? Where? Cause, I don't see him! You have-" Just before I could finish my point, Jerome cut me off.

"Shut up the fuck up! I'm tired of your nagging! I'll work when I want to! Now, take your happy ass in there and make me something to eat. That's all you're good for anyways, cooking and cleaning! And sucking a nigga dick! But, you can get better at that shit too!" he shouted, calling me out my name, saying everything but a child of God.

Jerome plopped down on the couch, making me walk up on him and slap him right across the face. I was sick and tired of all the disrespect and verbal abuse.

Staring at me with distaste, he shot up from his seat and charged at me. He held his now red cheek and glared at me. "I am not your housekeeper! I am - well was - your girlfriend! Get out, Jerome! Now!" He eyed me with the looks of a crazed man. Jerome's eyes turned dark as he pushed me into the wall with force. He almost raised his hand to hit me, but I stood my ground.

"I'll be damned if you out your fucking hands on me! I already live in the slums! You don't do shit to help me and I'm tired of your sorry ass! I don't need a weak-boy-of-a-man around this house who can't even pay a single bill! You're not my child and I'll be damned if I clean up behind you; you're sorry! You're not the man I used to know, and you damn sure wasn't a man if you were going to hit me! You piece of shit ass nigga!" There was a look in his eyes that showed how shocked he was. I was so damn soft spoken, but this was my breaking point. His eyes softened and he extended his arms to hold me. The anger turned into love, but guess who definitely couldn't give a fuck less about him? Me.

"Baby, I-" Holding my hand up in his face, I was tired of that sorry line he was about to give me.

"Shut up! Just shut your stupid ass up! You know I'll fight back! So, go, now! I don't want you here anymore! Bye, Jerome!" I walked over to the door and opened it for him. His face was so soft, but I wasn't having it. "Leave! Do you catch the drift now?"

He took one last look before he walked over to the door. He stood there for another second but, for some reason, he turned around and pushed me back as if I was a rag doll. This Jerome? The man standing right in front of me. I didn't know him; he went behind his back and pulled out a gun.

"So — after all this bull! You're going to pull a gun on me! What a damn pussy of a man you are!" Jerome grabbed my neck as he stared at me, trying to strike fear into me. But, me, my eyes stayed put on him. Just as his was on me.

"Fuck! I love you and you know that shit! It was supposed to be us against the world! Don't do this shit, you'll regret it later, Jalanda!"

Squinting my eyes, I said, "Get out. I don't ever wanna see your twisted ass face again son! I hate you!" My New Yorker clearly flaring up inside me. Jerome's face frowned and he finally broke his eye contact from me. He pulled his hand down from my neck and backed up, examining the monster he had truly become.

"It'll be a cold day in hell... before I give you up. Remember that!" he spoke as if it was a curse. His words almost felt cold as they exited his mouth. I knew Jerome was a coldhearted nigga. I'd grown to learn this key note about him. Something dark within him was turned on. Deep down in my gut, I didn't like it. Was I going to let him see me sweat? Hell no. Standing my ground, he blew me a devilish kiss, then stepped out the front door. Slamming the door behind him, I looked around and it felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders. But, I was still stuck in this hell hole and more. I dismissed his threats; nothing was going to break me again.

I was wishing I would've taken my dad's advice and lived with him for a little while longer, especially throwing that sorry Jerome out of my life. But since my dad had money, I wanted to earn my own. I never knew it would be this hard to do; being a full adult sucked sometimes.

I never needed a man to help me, but I never wanted one to hold me back either. So, he had to be cut loose. I was better off working on myself and getting my life together.