Mistrust ⭐Commander Lexa⭐

Mistrust

Your bedroom is a prison.

You feel confined: something itches under your skin begging for you to run.

The guards at your door are silent but you remember them pushing you here in the first place.

You're not sure you can even call this room yours after what happened at the Coalition meeting.

Your chest aches with hurt and betrayal but they're nothing compared to your fury.

You pace needing to move, needing to do something and that's when she makes her grand entrance.

The door opens and you see her stoic stance and walk to the other end of the room disgusted.

"Leave us, " the order is filled with steel and you hear the rapid footsteps followed by the door slam.

Lexa calls your name but you ignore it glowering at the wall.

Then she touches your shoulder and you turn pushing her off.

"Don't touch me, " you seethe and march to the other side of the room.

Lexa mirrors your movements turning herself until the both of you are face to face.

Her green eyes jump between each feature of your face before settling on your eyes.

"How could you not tell me Prince Roan of Azgeda is your father? "

You scoff.

"You don't get to be angry, " you shake your head furious. "You're not the victim here. I'm the one locked up for a crime I didn't commit and you're the one who did this."

You move away again trying to get some space.

"What was I supposed to think? " Lexa's voice raises in her own ire. "You said nothing about him being your father. You said nothing of being Azgeda."

Your laugh is painful in its mocking.

"I am not Azgeda and he isn't my father. "

You cross your arms defensive.

Lexa's eyes widen into almost plates taking up most of her face before she regains control.

"Explain."

The word is curt; short in her need for honesty.

"He made me but he didn't raise me. He isn't my father. I have no ties to the Ice Nation. "

Lexa leans back taking a step away and you wonder if a breeze could knock her over right now.

"I-"

The sound of her voice makes your stomach curl and hurt slowly bleeds away the anger.

"How would you know?" You interrupt and take two steps closer. "You wouldn't. I didn't tell you and for good reason. "

This.

It's insists unsaid but true and her tan pales with the realization.

"I needed to know you were still an ally. "

You shake your head and sit on the couch exhausted.

All breath is knocked out of your chest.

"You'd believe him over the woman who shares your bed. "

Lexa gingerly sits beside you then moving her leg knowing you don't want her to touch you.

"You've only heard his point of view not mine, " you say and exhale shortly.

You swallow harshly feeling sick from everything that's happened.

"You really thought I'd betray you, " you lean against the seat feeling dizzy at the mistrust. "That hurts."

Hesitantly, Lexa leans her hand hovering over your thigh.

When you don't move away, she places her hand there and squeezes.

"I needed to be sure, " she licks her lips rubbing them together. "I'm sorry."

You ache at your fragility but your insides are shattering knowing she didn't trust you.

The room is spacious easily double the size of any room you've ever slept in but it's confining walls eat away at you.

"Am I still a prisoner, Commander? " The formal title is awkward on your tongue but you feel too exposed to be so open.

She closes her eyes and rubs her lips together again before responding.

"Your imprisonment is lifted and it will be known. "

The words are odd, stilted, but you still rise.

"I'll tell them to ready my quarters."

The Commander flinches but doesn't contest it watching you leave with watery eyes.

"I am sorry. "

You take a deep breath.

"This isn't revenge, " you shrug your shoulders. "I just need to leave right now."

You turn to leave and are surprised when her fingers grapple yours in a death grip.

You watch her fingers seeing them tremble against yours and go onto your knees.

Lexa's breath is shaky and you pull her head close letting your foreheads touch.

She closes her eyes and the two of you just breathe for a couple minutes until the shaking stops.

"I'm not leaving Polis," you reassure her and stand up rubbing her cheek in comfort.

You feel her stare begging you to stay and it takes everything in you to shut that door.