Losing at Eighteen

Prologue

Prologue

The tires of my red Mini Cooper Paceman grounded across the snow covered highway at a comforting pace. I was always being told how much a great driver I had been ever since I got my licence and I figured people only told me that because I drove the actual speed limit and haven't had a ticket in my life. I'm use to driving in silence but tonight was different. We were on our way back from celebrating Holland's 18th birthday at the Hills Cafe with a bunch of family and friends. I don't know even know how I got her to talk me into turning on the radio in the first place but I instantly regretted when I did.

"Holy crap! This is my song!" She shouted over the loud music as she turned it up a little higher than I liked. Clarity by Zedd blared through the speakers so loudly I felt as if we were at a live concert. I smiled as she rocked her head back and forth and snapped her fingers as she sung along to every word.

"High dive into frozen waves where the past comes back to life Fight fear for the selfish pain it was worth it every time Hold still right before we crash, cause we both know how this ends A clock ticks 'till it breaks your glass and I drown in you again Cause you are the piece of me, I wish I didnt need Chasing relentlessly, still fight and I don't know why If our love is tragedy, why are you my remedy? If our loves insanity, why are you my clarity?" She sung as if her life had depended on it and it made me laugh a bit. Although her singing wasn't that great it didn't bother me much I found much enjoyment in watching her be crazy. 

As we drove she continued to sing as best she could and even tried getting me to sing with her. I'm not much of a singer so you could imagine why I declined.

"No, I'm okay" I told her as she placed an imaginary microphone in front of my mouth and  she laughed shaking her fist in front of me.

"Come on! just sing a line" She pleaded and I glanced at her and back at the road. It had been began snowing lightly again and I took a deep breathe and sighed.

"Fine... If our love is tragedy, why are you my remedy? If our loves insanity, why are you my clarity?" I began singing and she sung along. I of course wasn't able to stop there. We had to finish the song with a bang as she held out the longest note she could until the song was completely over.

"See that wasn't so bad now was it?" She asked fixing her seat belt and leaning her head on the head rest. 

"Yeah I guess not" I replied gripping the steering wheel with two hands. Another song began to play that I wasn't really familiar with so I turned it down as we approached a red light. 

"What song is this?" Holland asked turning it up a little right after I removed my fingers from the volume knob.

"No idea, has a nice ring to it though" I admitted running my fingers through my blonde shoulder length hair. 

"Feeling my way trough the darkness Guided by a beatin heart I can't tell where the journey will end But I know where to start" The song started and I slightly bobbed my head. Holland soon followed suit with her brown hair swaying back and forth. When we both noticed we were copying each other we immediately broke out in laughter. 

"This is why we're best friends I honestly couldn't think of any other reason god put us on this earth to do" She said and I giggled.

"Awe come on don't get all sappy on me" I replied and she laughed. 

"I'm just saying ya know?" She said and I rolled my eyes. The light finally turned green after what I though was forever and I pressed my small foot to the gas and we slowly took off. 

Lights suddenly glared in my eyes as we drove and I heard tires that weren't my own screeching. A piercing scream followed by a extremely loud bang rang in my ears. The car spun uncontrollably across the snow covered road until moments later it came to a slow stop. I couldn't see anything but head lights and blurred out images of white sparkles around me and I slowly picked my head up from the steering wheel. Something warm slid down my forehead and cheek as I turned to my right to see Holland slouched over on to the dashboard.

"Holland?" I said her name as If i didn't know who she was and I reached over to shake her.

'Holland get up!" I stated in more of a panic this time around but I still got no answer. I fought to get my seat belt off causing sharp pains in my left arm but I didn't care to check on it.

"Holland! Holland please get up!" I screamed at her pulling her limp body upward in a sitting position and I still got nothing. Her soft brown eyes bore into my blue ones immediately causing me to cry. I held her in my arms for as long as I possibly could. Sirens soon filled the silence I was left with but I didn't move an inch. 

"Ma'am are you alright?" A voice called out from behind but I didn't say anything, I couldn't say anything.

"Ma'am? ma'am are you alright?" The officer asked again as he spoke into the car looking at me and then examining the damage. 

I nodded.

"Alright ma'am the fire department has just pulled up and we're gonna get you out of there is she alright?" He asked and I cried. I cried so hard I thought i'd brake a vesicle or something. The offers eyes went down to his shoes as he gave me a small nod and walked away. Moments after there were fire fighters and paramedics surrounding the car pulling doors off of hinges.

"Okay in a minute or two I'm gonna count to three and we're gonna pull you out of there but I'm gonna need you to let go of her and give me for your hands" The officer stated and I said nothing. He was a fairly young police man and I had never seen him around before seeing as our town was pretty small. It wasn't my intentions to be rude and not answer his questions but I just couldn't speak.

"What's your name?" He asked as fireman continued to work through the demolished car to get us out.

"Jo" I managed to say and he nodded as he climbed up to the sunroof and pried what was left of it opened.

"Alright good Jo, my name is Officer Scott Jacobs and i'm gonna need you to let go of your friend and give me your hands" He said reaching his own down into the car but I didn't do as he asked, not at that very moment.

"Jo I know this will probably be the hardest thing you'll ever have to do but I have to get you out of here... Don't worry I'm gonna get her out too I promise" He added and I looked at Holland and then up to the officer above me. I slowly unwrapped my arms from hers and grabbed hold of his as tightly as I could.

"Okay now I'm going to pull you up on three you read? One, Two, Three" He pulled me up in one swift motion. He pulled me into his arms as he carried me off the car carefully and placed me in the back of an ambulance. I watched as two other officers easily pulled Holland out and placed her on a stretcher. I watched carefully as they tried to revive her but just couldn't. I also watched as they zipped her body up in black bag and wheeled her off. 

My eyes wouldn't leave from the spot were my car sat destroyed. Water flooded them and made everything I looked at blurry.

I couldn't a thing.