teachers // wolfstar au [REVISING]

Chapter One - Love at First Fight, Except Not Really

"Mr. Lupin?" Remus looks up as his name is called from one of his students.

"Yes?" He replies in a tone that can only mean please leave me alone, I'm very busy ignoring you all at the moment.

"Well, the class was wondering if we could ask you a question." The boy said nervously, biting his lip.

"I don't see why not, as long as it's appropriate." Remus answered cautiously, not really wanting to know what the curious students could possibly want to know.

"Are you dating someone?" A girl blurted out, then blushed immediately afterward. What the fuck?

"I happen to be single at the moment..." Remus answered, trailing off at the end, wondering what the hell was going on.

"There's this one guy we think is perfect for you!" The original boy spoke up again, wearing a smirk that fit his face perfectly.

"And who is that, Mr. Jordan?" He asked, getting slightly more interested. Who could they be talking about? Surely not another teacher... Surely not...

"Mr. Black!" The entire class just about screamed at him and he flinched away. Of course.

Of course it would be him. The most obnoxious person in this world.

"No, absolutely not! That man would probably eat a rag if I dared him to!" Remus couldn't hold himself back and shouted his retort at his class.

"That's funny, because he said something really similar about you." Lee Jordan's smirk was getting bigger and bigger and it made Remus want to slap him. But of course, he was the teacher, and apparently teachers are respectable people.

"What did that soggy pillowcase say about me?!" Remus demanded the class, sounding a bit angry.

"Well, he said he'd rather eat a dirty washrag than date you." Lee told his teacher, laughing slightly.

"Ooh, that caveman! I cannot believe that piece of s-!" At that exact moment, the principal strolled into his classroom, looking kind of amused.

"Piece of what, Mr. Lupin?" Principal McGonagall asked, wearing a smirk on her face. McGonagall worked at Hogwarts basically her entire life, and everyone in the word was terrified of her. Literally. Everyone at supermarkets steer clear of the stern looking lady.

"Piece of pie, McGonny!" Remus replied quickly, begging for a blush not to take over his face.

The class burst out into laughter and he face palmed. "You guys were supposed to have my back!" Remus hissed at them angrily. "Now you're all getting homework!"

They class groaned in reply, but Remus simply glared back at them.

"No, but seriously, what were you talking about? What couldn't you believe?" Principal McGonagall asked him, tilting her head genuinely wanting to know the answer.

"We said that he and Mr. Black should date and he said that he wouldn't because Mr. Black would eat a rag!" The backstabber Lee Jordan told the principal.

"You can't just tell her these things!" Remus stomped his foot and pouted and they all laughed at him.

"Oh, really, Mr. Lupin? That's a little laughable, because Mr. Black said he'd rather eat a filthy rag than date you." She told him, her eyes twinkling in amusement.

"This is the worst day of my life." Remus buried his face into his hands while the class laughed at his torture.

-

Sirius felt his eyes narrow as he listened to what his class was telling him.

"What do you mean he said I'd eat a rag if he told me to? Like I'd listen to a thing that rat would say. Oh, the nerve of that man!" Sirius marched across his classroom, pointing wildly in the direction of Remus' classroom.

"What are you getting so worked up about?" A student asked him, raising an eyebrow.

"You don't understand! He insulted my pride and honor! I can't just let that slide... What can I do to defend myself?" Sirius wondered allowed, hoping one of his students would give him a decent reply.

"You should pull a prank on him!" One of his students-had to be a Weasley- said to him.

A prank would never work, Sirius thought, that would be too childish, too stupid, too moronic... Wait a minute, he was all of those things!

"A prank! You are one hundred percent right! But what should I do...?" Sirius began thinking out loud, trying to come up with a prank that would make Remus want to resign/marry Sirius. It wasn't even that Sirius liked Remus, because he didn't. Sirius just couldn't believe that Remus didn't like him. At all. Because he is such a like-able person.

"Aha!" Sirius exclaimed and pumped his fist into the air, jumping up and down. "Quick, when are most of you in Remus' class?"

"The period right before this." Lee Jordan said and the plan set in Sirius' head, becoming more detailed by every passing second.