Simon The Vampire From Math Class

Episode 1

"Hi my name is Bella Tator Totts and I'm from Louisiana. I'm new here." Introduced Bella, twirling her boring ass brown hair in her fingers like a white girl.
Her sparkly blue eyes matched every cliché she could think of. Bella looked around the classroom, her eyes paying no attention to the fugly nerds that littered the area like trivial peices of garbage. Bella's eyes darted to a mysteriously boy who sat on the back, dressed in a flannel and a band T-Shirt that everyone pretended to know but know one actually knew anything about. He waz totes spectacular. She was a just Queen, in search of a fine ass honey she could call a King, and she found him. His jaw line could cut a cinderblock, and his red lips looks like he'd applied a shit ton of rouge lip liner on. Which, he didn't, because boys don't wear makeup because gender roles and stuff.

"Lame." Said the boy in the back, his eyes rolling with more angst than thousand twilights conventions filled with teen girls who would eat Edward Cullen's vomit for breakfast if they had the chance.
"Now Simon, don't be rude," the teacher turns to Bella, "Yo, I'm sorry homedog but the only available seat is next to that asshat. Good luck have fun." With that, Mr. Tree pushed Bella away. She walked to the back of the class, her heart thumping in her chest.
She sits down quietly, suddenly feeling the urge to burp and fart at the same time out of nervousness.
"You're gross." Bella snears at Simon, even though she knew that they were totally gonna bang in the end.
"Yea, well your last name is Tater Tots."
"Tator tots are delicious! Bitch you ain't know nothin'."
"I wouldn't know, I don't eat human food." Simon whispers sadly, but Bella still hears.
"Ah, that's probably why your such a skinny ass bitch."