A Damned Sacrifice

The Damned Sacrifice

A ringing pounded through my ears, flooding my senses as all pitches and sounds danced together in my mind, blurring themselves so definitely that I could not pick the meaning of one above another in my dreary haze. But one did reach past the wall of morning fog, slowly registering to my dazed self. A sound no mother could ever ignore.

Today there were not spots in my eyes as I stumbled around in faded lace, maybe once the fabrics would have been replaced before, but now many milk stains covered the back of my shoulders and I couldn't care. The blonde angel in my arms was the only thing that could make me care. No the mirror, not the ice of the rough floors, not the scars inside my heart.

Shoes were easy to put on, but I bothered not with my nicer clothes and grabbed the first I saw. Inside this still wasn't real, inside I could hear no screams, see no bullet discharge against the crying sky. The sloped halls outside were not flooded with Jewish flesh, heartbeats did not stop as skin and bone was crushed into the wooden panels. The man that had sworn to me was not aiming at my own broken heart as my heels clashed against the loud stairs.

But denial can only take one so far, and every last shard of warmth remaining inside my shadow fled when those double barrels pointed at my little angel. Forbidden Hell fire spurned inside my dark beauty and ear-wrenching screams pierced to my soul, every pounding second bring my destroyed self to my final, damned demise. The flames of my anger morphed within, I did not care for myself any longer, and the chocking despair around me could not penetrate my being. The anger that burned to the high heavens darken inside, morphing to even more deadly pillars of ice, so frozen they burned. My little angel looked at my with her summer eyes, shining with the warmth of a clear sky. Around me the jostling bodies did not matter, the pain of splitting families did not matter, the blood covering the cobble stone did not matter. The child next to my hear did matter. Why was this happening? I did not care. The devil's song was too tempting, and I would no longer resist, I would follow behind him into the eternal darkness, but I would save the last warmth I had first. The man that I had once called husband, almost given my God up for escorted the women around me with a deadly joy showing though his eyes, he would join me in the court of the damned one day, where the pain that had torn us apart would chain us together.

The women around me split, almost as if a great power was helping me. The child in my arms was calm as I whispered sweet nothings to her, and a final instruction as I set her down. The man in front of me was surrounded by other uniforms, the gold on my frozen hand loose with starvation. It slipped off easily, and I knew my hollowed eyes would haunt him forever and I watched his until the wedding band kissed his feet and rang of the cobblestones, as his comrades' faces were hidden by powdered discharge, as my heart ceased to fight, as my body became another stepping stone against the ground for the herded assembly.