I've never saw much meaning in life when I was younger. You live life eat, sleep, work and repeat it all over until one day you have peace. I never wanted to get older I wanted the days to stretch as long as they could, I wanted every second to feel like hours. But the more I wanted it to slow down the faster it went. The days passed like hours. I was never the cool kid when I was little I didn't know what was "cool" back then and neither do I today. I kept to myself most of the time I was usually really quite in everything I did. I liked to day dream almost any time I could. I always imagined myself as the most popular kid in school because I never was. I always imagined myself as a hero, the schools cool kid, a person I will never be. I didn't have a lot of confidence in myself overall I didn't like the way I looked, walked, talked, or thought of. I was constantly downing myself because I knew I would never be anything. So that habit grew and got worse which lead to other habits I'm not proud of. I always wanted to know how people were so perfect they where able to talk to anyone able to do anything able be them selfs. I always wanted to know why they where so amazing. Then I just stoped caring I stoped trying I let the habits consume me and I was empty for a while I was just a shell walking around looking totally fine on the outside but empty on the inside. I was on my breaking point but then I opened up to someone I didn't even know and I never thought I would have seen today with out their help. I still like to think of me as a little kid still dreaming about the wildest things just not something I don't want to be
