Between Love and Hate (Julian Casablancas fanfic)

My feelings?

I woke up to Dallon putting Rivers on me and Rivers laughed and played while I slowly woke up. "Since all the drama yesterday I decided to make you a nice breakfast to make things happier" he said kissing me so I sat up and he sat a plate of bacon, pancakes, and eggs on my lap with some juice on the side table so I laughed kissing him goodbye as he had to leave for work. I was eating my food when I got a text

Julian: am I still going to pick up Rivers later?

Me: yah but it's quite a while from now, hey now I don't have to pay for a babysitter when me and Dallon are gone GREAT!

Julian: ha, wait Dallon isn't there?

Me: no he has 2 jobs one that he works most of the week in the morning, yesterday when he left that's the other job but it's random, he usually leaves around this time so he can't stay till I get home

Julian: oh well that's good that he has a job

Me: yah I guess, extra money on the table

And like that he didn't respond so I guess he got bored or had something else to do. I finished my breakfast and changed Rivers diaper getting his stuff ready and getting ready for work. I had gotten out of the shower and just threw on some shorts and a shirt to see who it was at the door because someone knocked, and it was Julian of course it's Julian who else would it be. "Hey Julian what are you doing here so early" I asked as I let him in

"I don't know, I guess to spend some time alone" he said so I slowly blinked at him and sighed

"Well okay then, so what do you want to talk about" I said walking back to my bedroom planning what to wear and Julian looked around our room

"Really only large" Julian said so I turned around to see him holding a box of condoms

"JULIAN!" I yelled trying to snatch it away but he was too tall for me

"What about me, extra large" he smirked so I glared at him

"Fine hold the box of condoms my fiancé uses to fuck me" I said and he pouted putting them down knowing saying fiancé would hurt his feelings. "Plus I wouldn't just use someone for sex" I said and mumbled "unlike some people" but moved on to other subjects before he figured out what I said.

"Feels like forever since I've been in here" Julian said looking around more and saw pictures of me and Dallon smiling and kissing so Julian picked it up sighing then put it down. He sat down on my bed playing with Rivers while I went to the bathroom to change. I came back out and Julian looked me up and down so I gave him a sideways glance since I literally just wearing some jeans and a tee shirt.

"So you do know how to change a diaper right?" I asked and he shook his head "really don't you have younger siblings?"

"Yah but I never changed their diapers, I was a rebellious teen not wanting to take care of little babies" he laughed making a raspy voice while saying that so I laughed

"So what you do first.." I said explaining the rest while showing him, he was right by my side so close that our arms were touching. He picked up Rivers and swig him around making him giggle so I laughed.

"Go to mama" Julian said standing him up and I awkwardly laughed sitting him on the bed. I started to do my makeup while Julian was watching and playing with Rivers. When I was finished I went back into the room and saw that Rivers was calling Julian dad so he shrugged his shoulders smirking so I took a deep breath and sighed groaning a bit. I handed Julian the bag to change diapers and other necessities and headed outside. Julian was about to just leave with Rivers but I stopped him

"Dude he needs a car seat" I said as he remembered that he needed one so I rolled my eyes "god you make a horrible father" and he playfully scoffed at me. I took the one out of my car and bent down into his placing the car seat there and buckling Rivers in. "You seem like such a dad now, with a car seat and everything" I laughed still bent down to fix everything and checking if everything was secure, that's when Julian grabbed my ass rubbing up against me so I stood up straight and pushed him away "what the fuck is your problem!" I yelled at him