UNSINKABLE

Bewail

Bewail

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Pronunciation: /bəˈwāl/

VERB

Express great , , or over (something)

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It's a peaceful morning, and it's a stark contrast to the emotional turmoil she is feeling inside. It's 10 am and she just got home from grocery shopping. What was meant to plainly be just a trip to the grocery store had become a rude awakening.

She was about to drive home when a familiar car pulled over right beside her spot. Her heart started to beat so fast in anticipation of what's about to come. Her car is new and it's heavily tinted so she shouldn't worry about being seen. She still worried though- and it's because she knew that the person about to come out of that familiar car would have the power to break down whatever barrier she's managed to build around herself over the years. Her breath hitched when a man finally came out of the car. Thomas.

It had been five years since she last saw him. It's funny how he was still using the same car- a car they chose together years ago. Of course it wasn't because he didn't have any other car. He's rich and had tons of cars and she's sure of that. Yes, she hasn't personally seen him for years but that didn't mean she wasn't up to date with what had been going on with his life.

She felt her heart twinge at the thought of his life- one that he's living happily, one that they could've been living together. If only she didn't screw up.

She watched as Thomas walked around his car and opened the door to the passenger side. Even before she could see the person he was opening the door for, she already knew who it was- Arra San Agustin.

She felt another pang in her heart at the sight of Thomas and Arra hand in hand and slowly walking towards the grocery shop. She's not stupid so she knows he's going grocery shopping with his girlfriend, and that shows he's serious about the relationship. She should be happy because that means Thomas has moved on, and that moreover means that he has come to terms- or is no longer bothered at the very least- with how she did him wrong in the past.

She should be happy because she just saw that he is happy. She should be happy, but she's not. She's miserable. She's hurting, and she just can't be happy. With just one glance at Thomas, her whole being got filled with a profound sense of sadness. Funny thing is, no matter how sad she feels she can't even get herself to shed even just a single tear. She can't even cry out all the pain she feels. She's stuck with a heart coated with misery and suffocating from a wall of unshed tears. In a way, this could still be her punishment for causing Thomas so much pain in the past. She almost chuckled bitterly at the thought of an old quote. Life gives us what we deserve. Maybe this is what she deserves. Maybe she deserves to be miserable.

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"Ara" A feminine voice jolted her from her thoughts. She turned around to see her best friends Mika and Kim. She didn't even hear the two of them come in. She forced a smile on her face and gave her friends a quick hug.

"Napadaan ata kayo?" she watched as the smiles on her friends' faces turn into frowns.

"Nakalimutan mo? We're supposed to go and buy our outfit for our reunion diba?" She initially didn't forget about it. But then, she saw Thomas and all other thoughts flew out of her head.