Never Letting Go

Chapter 1: The only Rogue from Red Wood. (Nina POV)

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Nina POV.

Four years. That's how long I had been a lone wolf, a rogue. It wasn't by choice however. It all ended for me March 25th. Our Alpha was killed and our pack was disbanded. The Luna had died several years back when I was eight years old. They weren't there anymore to keep us together. And if they didn't then who would? I know I certainly couldn't. I had hit the road after that. I didn't take anyone from the pack with me. I was alone. And I was fine with that. I didn't want to be responsible for anyone and in all honesty I felt responsible for the pack splitting up. But what could I do? I was the only wolf out of the Red Wood Pack to become a rogue. All the rest joined other packs. I know. I didn't leave till I made sure everyone was taken care of. Many tried to get me to come with them but I couldn't. I wouldn't.

I was only fifteen when I started out. My first year solo was definitely tough. But I managed. My father had taught how to fight and survive. He was an amazing man. But he is dead now. I mourn his and my mother's loss ever day. Its hard not to think of them as I walk around. I am alone with my thoughts after all.

I walk everywhere I go. Some would call me a wanderer. Most would call me a hobo. I don't beg though. No, begging would draw attention to me and that is the last thing I want. My parents left me a very sizeable bank account which I have been using to provide for stuff I cant get on my own. The money mostly goes to one night stays at motels or bed and breakfasts. I can hunt in the forest if I'm starving. But when I do buy food I make it last. I can't say I spend any money on personal items. The only exceptions are toothpaste, deodorant, and period supplies. I buy the necessary amount of clothes I need which isn't much; one bra (which I wear everyday), two pairs of underwear, a pair of Nike shorts, a black tank top, a pair of jeans (which I nearly wear everyday), and a hoodie (which I wear every single day.) Whenever I stop at a place for the night, which is pretty frequent, I wash my clothes. Lol, I'm not that gross.

 I make sure everything I have can fit into a small back pack. It makes it easy for traveling and staying under the radar. In my travels I try to avoid most people. I only converse or interact with those I must. Even though I am a rogue myself I don't deal with any others. They all have different reasons for becoming rogues than I. I also make sure to avoid packs and their territory. That is a harder feat however. Pack territories are vast and some times its impossible not to go through. But when I do I make sure to stay in the town and not go through the forest. Sometimes they don't detect me but other times they do. Some allow me to pass through with no problem while others capture me and stick my in their dungeons. I always get out though and am gone before they can stop me. No one has been able to keep me. I have come across packs where members of my former pack have now joined. I avoid those like the black plague. Not that I don't love them, they were family of course, I just cant bare to face them.

In my four years of wandering I have made it all the way to Missouri from North Carolina. I don't know where I'm going but I know that nothing is going to stop me. Nothing. I wont ever join another pack. My past wont allow it. It seems like a pretty dismal future. It is a dismal future. But I'm alright with that. Or at least that is what I tell myself. I have nothing to look forward to. I have no blood family left. My pack is no more. I don't know where I'm going and don't much care. And as for a mate, I cant have one. He probably will be in a pack so that is a strike right there. And second strike is that pack wolves hate rogues. They are usually killed if they aren't careful. Besides, if he knew me, he wouldn't want me. I know it. Heck, I don't even want myself. The saying about 'your past defines your future' or whatever is really spot on.