I Need Him

“HARRY! LOOK OUT!”

 Harry jerked the wheel trying to avoid the oncoming car.

 “SARA, CAN YOU HEAR ME?” I heard him and I tried so hard to respond. I kept opening my mouth to scream his name but nothing was coming out.

“SARA, PLEASE SAY SOMETHING!” I did in my mind. God did I scream in my head. I tried to move but my arm was tangled in something. Next thing I knew I was alone in the street. I look around but couldn’t see anything.

“Sara turn around.” I jumped at the sound of Harry’s voice.

 “Harry! Where are you? I can’t see anything.” I looked around me but couldn’t see anything. It was like I was in a black hole.

“Sara you know I love you right?”

“Of course I do, where are you?”

“Do you love me?”

“Yes, I love you Harry. Come out please. You are starting to scare me.”

“Sara promise you won’t give up. Promise me you won’t do anything stupid and you will move on from me.”

“Harry what are you talking about? We will always be together.”

“NO! We can’t be together anymore! Don’t you understand?”

“Harry you are scaring me. WHERE ARE YOU?!?” I screamed! Where was he? Why was he saying all this to me? I kept running towards the sound of his voice.

“I love you Sara, always remember that.”

“HARRY! Please come back! Where are you? I need you Harry!”

                I jumped up in my bed breathing raged. What was that? I turned in my bed to wake Harry to have him comfort me when all I felt was blanket. Everything came back in a flash, the car accident, Harry screaming for me, then nothing. I screamed out crying. Harry was gone; I would never see him again. I walked into my bathroom when I got a look of myself in the mirror. I looked dead, I shuttered at the thought.  It was one of those nights again when the depression hit me hard. Usually I would call Louis and talk to him about the nightmare I keep having, or about all the good times with harry.

                I knew I should have called Louis the moment I thought it but I couldn’t. I would be happy wouldn’t I? I could be with Harry like before with just one jump. The boys usually stopped me, but this time it was like it consumed me. The voices in my head kept telling me to do it. I wanted to so bad. I walked from the bathroom to the hallway closet where I kept most of the pain relievers. This was what I wanted from the beginning, to be with Harry and to feel no pain. I knew I couldn’t just leave the world like Harry had to. I walked back in my room and grabbed my notebook along with my journal that had my feeling for all of them. I wrote a simple goodbye. No need to go to in depth because it was all in my journal. They would all know how bad my depression was and that I knew this was going to happen. I just wanted them to know it wasn’t their fault and I need to be with Harry again.

                Putting the stuff on my counter I grabbed my phone and headed to my bathroom again. Dialing the number for Louis I swallowed more than enough the take away the pain. I heard the phone ring as I sank the floor feeling dizzy.

“Hello? Sara are you there?”

“I love you Louis.” I dropped the phone hearing Louis screaming my name to please stop. I laid down letting the world slowly slip away from me.

                “Sara, is it really you?”

“Harry!”