You don't know what it's like.
You couldn't possibly know.
Couldn't know the feeling that I get whenever I see a blade
And I wonder.. Just how sharp is it?
You couldn't know the pull I feel to pick it up,
Look at the way it shines
And make another bracelet.
There really is no way for you to feel the itch
It feels like your bones are coated in ivy
And there's only one way to scratch
Deep enough.
I make bracelets
My beads are blood-red
They criss-cross around and around
My wrists.
You couldn't know how much I hate myself
And then I think
Of all the reasons why I shouldn't
And I hate myself even more.
It's an endless cycle
Sometimes I can keep it at bay,
Keep myself distracted for months on end
Then comes a day that is pure joy
And I remind myself how I'm undeserving
Or a night of pure loneliness
And I find solace in my bracelets
Once more
Every time,
It's the last time
Every time,
I vow
Never again.
Never again.
Never again.
I make bracelets
My beads are blood-red
They criss-cross around and around
My wrists.