sitting down in the chairs that come up when you stand up are the best, they remind me of growing up in the audience watching so many variety of musicals. now when I sit in this style of seat what comes to mind it you. how you would grasp my thigh and how I would put my hand over yours holding it tight when the movie made us all jump. now I know next time I sit in this style of chair it will feel like heartbreak over and over again. thankfully they don't have this style of chair at my therapist. this is when I spend most of my time sitting down in the normal style seats or laying down face up on a couch. you broke me,these chairs broke me. they remind me of childhood,innocence, love, laughter, heartbreak. but mostly heartbreak. who designed these chairs I ought to tell them the pain they have caused me all because of the style of the chair. I hope this is not coming across as I'm blaming a stranger for my hardships but I cannot blame myself or I would fall deeper into my own rabbit hole. I would fall to the bottomless pit, never coming out. stuck forever until it is all over till the last sliver of light turns to dark. now you try to contact me try to apologize when you've already left emotional scars on me. some people push my hurt to the side because there are no physical scars but emotional is almost worst. scars on you being heal scars inside never diminish. now you alter on how you feel about me but I still feel the same way about myself because of you. you ask me if I want to go catch a movie but I cannot sit next to you in the chairs that have brought such a wide variety of feelings and memories. you can't come back in my life when it's convenient for you. I'm already gone the smile you fell in love with will never return it hasn't since you left with it. you took the smile out of many other things are gone but those you cannot see they o deeper than the eye can perceive. so stay away fold up into the chair never speak to me again. I hate you but I hate me more because of you. fade into the blackness the backness... sit on a normal chair maybe if I would've stuck to the normal chairs I would still have my smile still have my light but it is wiped away wiped clean. but my soul feels so dirty and filthy. this is how you left me...
