Red One-Shots (The Mentalist Drabbles)

Chapter 1: Puddle

Disclaimer: I don't own the Mentalist. I merely wish I did...

My good friend, Razzl3, and I are each making a list of one-shots where we write stories based on a random word that we've come up with. Then, we'll compare them, and see what happened! So here are mine... when you finish, go read his, and comment, follow, vote, etc.

P.S. This isn't a competition. It might become one, though. I guess we'll see... :)

~~~

Agent Wayne Rigsby was freezing. He had thought that he had been cold before, but nothing came close to this- this frigid, desolate lack of warmth that chilled his bones and left him chattering.

It was December, and he and Cho were on a stakeout. Someone had killed someone else on the day after Christmas, and forced the CBI Special Crimes unit to have to come to work to solve the crime.

At least they had waited until the holiday was complete, thought Rigsby sarcastically.

And so, as was normal for the unit, Jane had set up an elaborate plan to lure the killer into a trap, and Cho and Rigsby had to keep watch. All was normal.

Except for the cold. And the wetness of the place where Cho and Rigsby were seated awkwardly- a small corner in an alleyway in downtown Sacramento. Rigsby checked his watch yet again. It was 11 o' clock, which meant that he and Cho had been sitting in a puddle for almost 4 hours.

Rigsby glanced over at Cho, stoic as ever, and wondered if he ever felt anything- including temperature. Rigsby wanted oh so badly to talk to someone- he was bored out of his mind. Or better yet- he could call the Boss and ask her if they could leave. Thoughts of the warmth of home fleetingly passed his mind. He pictured home- his couch, a warm blanket, several crunchy tacos, laying with Ben asleep on his shoulder- or better yet: laying with Agent Grace Van Pelt. He could almost feel the warmth and comfort, and his hope gave him a sudden, stupid confidence.

"Hey Cho."

"Hey," Cho replied.

"I was just wondering-"

"You were wondering if we could call Boss and ask to go home," Cho interrupted. It wasn't a question.

"Well- yeah! I mean- come on. What are the chances of this guy actually showing up tonight?"

Cho sighed. "Boss told us to stay here until he came. Jane said he would come."

"So? Jane's human. He can make mistakes."

"So call."

"I will."

~an awkward 30 seconds passes~

"I thought you were going to call," said Cho.

"I am."

"Okay."

~2 minutes later~

Cho looks at Rigsby and raises an eyebrow.

"I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna call." Rigsby takes a deep breath.

"Okay. It's your funeral."

Rigsby glares at Cho. "You know what? You have no feelings. You don't even want me to call. I'm gonna call, and-"

"And what?"

"And.. And we're gonna get out of sitting in this puddle, and it's gonna be because I was the one brave enough to do it."

"Oh yeah?" Cho says, uninterested.

"Yeah!"

"Well if I'm heartless, then you're a coward."

"Am not!"

~20 seconds later~

"Are you going to call or not?" Cho sighs.

"I AM GOING TO CALL!"

Cho blinks.

"I AM!"

"Well have fun with that, because I'm gonna leave now. They texted me that I could leave, you know." Cho stands up and begins to walk away.

"WHAT? And they didn't say I could leave?"

"You seemed to be having too much fun."

Rigsby's already-blue face turns red with fury. Summoning his best skill at insults, he shouts at Cho's retreating back, "WELL... YOU'RE COLD AND HEARTLESS AND... AND... YOU'RE A PUDDLE!"

His walkie-talkie crackles, and he hears the Boss, Grace, a voice he doesn't recognize, and Jane howling with laughter in the background. He snarls, "What?"

Jane replies, still chuckling, "You sure told him, Rigsby."

"Shut up. He deserved it."

"Walk down the street, and turn left," says his walkie-talkie back.

Irritated but curious, Rigsby does. And what he sees infuriates him even more.

In front of him is the CBI van, with Jane, Lisbon, Grace, Cho, and the killer- all toasty warm, comfortable, dry, and laughing.

He stomps up to the door and opens it, gets in, and slams it shut. "Very funny, guys."

His only reply is more laughter, and Jane saying, "Oh Rigsby! How nice of you to join us! You are a bit late, you know- for shame! I thought you were faster than that! Perhaps you should lay off the tacos a bit..."

The unit proceeds to laugh even harder.