Klaroline forever and always

Broken

Carolines POV
Its been 3 weeks since my mom died. Im trying to move on but I can't. I know people are trrying to help but they really aren't. Every one is broken and are sad. Damon is gone, ever since Elena is gone no one has seen him. Stefan is trying to find his brother but hasn't had any luck and Bonnie well don't even get me started on Bonnie, she lost her best friend and even though we will get to see Elena one day , Bonnie never will. Im trying to keep everyone happy and smiling but its so hard when I feel lost and sad inside. Im tired of everyone always saying "how are you doing?" and always saying "fine", because I'm not fine im far from fine , my bestfriend is dead and so is my mom , and I dont think I will ever be fine again.
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I wake up feeling like I have nothing to live for. I make a pot of coffee and read the newspaper, all of a sudden my phone rings and I see its Stefan. I answer and say "Hey Stef, hows the brother hunt going?" , he answers "well I found him... hes been in New Orleans hiding, but he doesnt want to come home". I feel a tingling feeling in my stomach at the mention of New Orleans , I respond and say " So are you gonna stay in New Orleans?" i really hope he isnt because he is my bestfriend right now, hes keeping sane , I need him here to help me. " Care I have to help my brother , Im sorry but I have to stay...but how are you doing?" . There it is again that stupid question, I answer him and say " Fine and I get it you have to take care of Damon, anyways im gonna go check on Bonnie talk to you later" and I hang up.

As Im walking over to Bons I start to feel jealous that Stefan gets to travel and just get away, thats what I wanat to do. Travel. I knock on Bonnies door and she answer , I go in and we go in her living room and just watch movies and laugh but its not the same as before , we try not to think about everything we lost. "I talked to Stefan today.... he found Damon" I say and Bonnie answers" thats good and quite frankly I miss them, you know?I just wanna get out of Mystic falls .... Care lets go on a roadtrip?" and for once in a long time I see Bonnie happy and smiling so I answer" Well , what are we waiting for?"