Untangle the Lies, You Must

4~A Can of Worms

I shuddered with a sob. His hand reached up to comfort me, maybe even wipe away the fresh tears, but I turned my back on him. "Get out of my head. Only one person has ever known almost everything and it didn't save either one of us from pain. If anything, the pain was worse."

I didn't see Luke's expression but the hurt I heard reflected in his voice told me he was being hammered with emotion as I was. "Who was it?"

I breathed in softly but it didn't help. The fresh slash of sorrow that hit me pushed me under an invisible surface. I closed my eyes. My fists clenched on their own to help block out the invisible agony. It didn't work.

I took energy to block the tears from falling. "No one. It wasn't anybody"

A firm hand tightened around my shoulder. I shrugged it off and crossed my arms as my chest tightened. "The more you open your world to somebody, the more interlocked you become. Your destinies begin to bind together as one even if you don't believe in fate." I blinked as the hand returned to my shoulder and carefully rubbed a thumb across my shoulder blade. I continued. "And when that bind is torn, you loose a part of yourself. When you loose a part of yourself, you won't be able to be who you once were. There is a gap or, in better words, a broken piece. When you have a broken piece, you can't just place it back like a puzzle piece. There are missing shards that will never be replaced or grown back. Therefore, the piece can't be put back on your own. You need someone to mend it for you, put the piece back, look at the scars around your heart, and love you unconditionally after what you went through."

The hand beckoned me to turn as the thumb dug into my shoulder blade. I obeyed reluctantly to meet tight blue eyes. His chest was heaving as he leveled his labored breath. "I can feel your agony. Someone hurt you along the way, I can feel it. I know how you feel."

He spoke the truth. His eyes searched mine desperately looking for something. As the waves battered me harder, he winced and pulled me closer. I stiffened. He paused and leaned closer to whisper in my ear. "I just want to hug you, Eliza."

My breath left me as his arms enveloped my back and pulled me. The fire that sparked in my chest provoked longing. I hugged him back around his neck and pressed as close as I dared to. I could have sworn I heard his breath hitch as his hands found the hidden handle of my blaster attached to my waist holster.

Heat flooded my veins, making me leave Luke's embrace with a gasp. He smiled softly. His eyes glowed but the pain was under their depths. Bags that weren't there before, now shadowed his eyes like small crevices of purple light. "I just flooded you with my happiness. If I stand correct, you haven't felt warmed in a while."

I frowned. "I haven't but I think you know how cold I am."

Luke winced. "Your skin is like ice. I haven't felt anything like it before."

I nodded and looked over his shoulder to find Obiwan with a smile of knowing on his face. I sneered as I wiped away the tear droplets. "Happy? Proud? You had better be."

Obiwan nodded, completely ignoring my harshness. His eyes twinkled. "Magnificent, Luke. Your first step with the Force will aid you. I don't recall it, Eliza, but I can feel it and now Luke is sensitive to your every emotion. He can relate to how you feel because he feels what you feel. He's connected to your emotions through the Force."

I huffed as the agony subsided with the memories and settled with eerie calmness. "I feel sorry for him. Beatings don't compare to this."

Obiwan frowned at my joking. "Be serious. You've been like this since before you joined the rebels. You need to let go of what's holding you back."

My lips set in a thin line. "I did but I still remember it every single day."

"Look in front of you and tell me what you see in your future."

Obiwan's request shook me. I looked at Luke and snarled. "You had this planned all along didn't you, old man?"

He grinned sideways at my fierce expression. "Perhaps."

Luke's eyebrows met. "What are you two talking about?"

I laughed before I could stop myself. He had no idea what was going on. Obiwan even managed a small smile of humor. R2-D2 gave numerous sounds as 3PO said, "You have a lot more to learn about humans than I realized. Women especially."

Obiwan smiled again. "It's best we get moving now before we risk running into more Sandpeople. Come on." He turned and began walking toward the Speeder. Luke and I exchanged a look. I giggled uncontrollably as my thoughts wondered to Obiwan's plan. All the emotions pushed aside but still lingering as a reminder that I was human and not made of ice.

It will never work, Obiwan's plan anyway. I will not fall in love with Luke Skywalker if he wanted me to and Luke could never fall for me. He knows how much I ache on the inside. He knows the baggage that comes with me. He also knows I'm more independent and fierce than my appearance lets on if he's truly connected to me by the Force.

Besides, it's better if you are alone. It saves you from opening a or another rift in your heart.