Late night thoughts.

Night 1.

                          The real structure

Every single person that sees her, sees lightness, happiness, a perfect life, but do you wanna know the real story?

--I mean, the real structure of her, what she was made of. Oh yes, sure you want to, I mean, look at that face! It's magical *laughs out loud* wanna see it? HA, I knew it... Well so, here we go:

Her cover is all filled with flowers, everywhere, a rainbow of colors painted in every single flower, beautiful, right?

The next cape was just grey, a color that represents neutrality in her, peace all around.

The one under de grey one is all filled with a dark purple, that represents that in any moment, even in the one that no one ever imagine, she was able to turn into another person, an angry one, a girl with problems and negativity everywhere, all around her, a dangerous woman.

But in another cape, the one under the purple one, there was like a little universe, with black and dark blue all around, both colors touching each other, creating a third one, it just make you forget about everything, you just can't think about anything else, but the paradise in front of you, make you feel like you are no longer afraid of anything, problems don't exist anymore and that's everything you need to live, the view was just... Amazing, it is an state where all just turns confuse, cause you know in the most inside of you that there are things to be worried about. But the view, it's just...you just can't, the view doesn't let you think about anything, just her. Like wow, is that possible? Maybe, I mean, it's happening, right? But, let me tell you a little secret that I just discovered: actually that cape is just visible for the ones that fell for her once, if you don't give a fuck about her, that cape just...it just doesn't exist for you, and i am really sorry because you don't have an idea of how awesome is to be there. It's a pleasure, for sure (if you were wondering).

Yes, there's another cape under the last one I named. It's all black, some people cannot see it, because sometimes (it might be that hard), that if you don't got any light inside of you, even if is just a little beam of light, you actually can get to think that there's no other cape. Like I said before, this cape can be the darkest you'll see, EVER, (if you get the chance to see it, of course), like for real, I have been in so many dark places and totally this is the darkest one, like, how? Sometimes you get to think that the black color in front of you is as infinite as the constellation, and then you start thinking about everything, like an avalanche of memories and thoughts coming over, one behind another one, and after the avalanche finish you see the fear. Yes, the feeling that appears right there when you care about what is about to happen and the mystery and the anxiety suddenly became your best friends, it's right in front of you.

And the first thing that comes to mind is: how is this possible? When did I get here? But the truth is, or I least what I think after all the phases I've been into with her, what I have discovered is that this is not the last cape, for more that what it seems to be. I mean, is like you are in the exactly end of all time. But behind this one there is... --Should I tell you this? I mean, this is confidentially, so. I'm so sorry, I won't tell this part... Thank you for watch this till the end, see you next time I fall (yes, maybe, it is never), but don't cry for me, cry for yourselves.

I was just kidding with you guys, I'm sorry, I couldn't hold it XD, so... Where did I left it? Oh yeah, yes, what's behind the black cape; well, I'm going to tell you this because, well, I think we are friends, aren't we? No? Oh, sorry then.

Okay, I was just kidding again, what's actually behind the black cape is...uhmm, okay, so... Maybe, I mean just if you are like the others, you didn't saw it or noticed that there's actually a little (that little) that probably that's why you didn't saw it, or, you need glasses babe, a little hole, yes, a hole, actually a bleeding hole, that is not bleeding anymore, so now it's dry. How do I know? Easy, I made it. I was so in love with her (I am), that I wanted to get the closest I could, so, I did what I thought it was the best, get insider.

At that moment, I thought it was impossible, I mean we were SO close, but I knew that there was another way to get closer, and as you can see, I decide to take it. I knew there was more than what I was watching, so I took it. I was shaking, like, oh God, i still remember how it felt; but what I saw at first wasn't what I thought, so what I did, was run.

The WORST decision ever, never run guys, not like I did before I found my treasure, cause all of her was there.

--Why!?, huh. I hate myself so bad for doing that, why did I...!?--

Ok, I should stop. So... going back to the point; what I found was a liquid, yes, actually a thick liquid, at first I thought it was blood, I was shocked, I mean, after I walked all of this, what's inside is just... Blood? Like, this is not real. I was so disappointed, like I have never been, the rest of the story is that I just ran from everything, I left her. How stupid I was, and it's not a question guys. After a few years I realized that my everything was her, anything in life could be possible without her, so I got back, but I did not expect that she is a person too, she needs love, too. So when I got back, she was with another guy, a handsome guy, not like me. In that moment, my hole world was in the floor, it was just destroyed.

After a long time I was caring for her from a long distance (she never knew and she will not), I realized that I was the only one who totally knew her, the real her. So one day, I decided to finish my travel, and what I discovered is that actually the liquid wasn't blood, it was like any other liquid, but inside of it, it was all contained by problems and fights, kind of like another cape that protects the real her, like a shield. I mean, the center of all, where all of her was bleeding from, like feelings, emotions, thoughts, lightness, darkness, everything. The center was her soul, the real her, the center was where her love and hate were bleeding from, and no one, never, but me, were able to be there, able to be finally together, just one soul, the result of the connection of OUR souls, just like one, forever.

But I ran, so it will never became true. But let me tell you my only secret at the moment: every time I go to sleep I think about how it would feel like; her soul and my soul, just as one; and while I'm sleeping that's all that cross my mind, forever.