Tears spring into my eyes
As if I willed them to define
My mask of happiness.
I smile through the pain
I conceal all
I hide all
I won’t let you in
Unless I trust you.
You think you know me
But very few do
I am a complex book
I have a past
Unknown too many.
I build this wall
Around my heart
Fortified it not to fall
I let you in
Thinking you were different
I gave you my heart
To protect and guard
But in return
I’m left in the dark
I fear the worse,
Like I constantly do.
Did you puncture my heart
With the things left unsaid?
As days drag into weeks
I begin to wonder
If indeed I was mislead
Once again
By my heart and mind.
I gave you all
My body, my heart
Now I am left
All alone in the dark
Left alone to wonder
Left alone to fear.
I gave you all
In hopes it was enough
I gave you all
In hopes you were the one,
But now I am left-
Left in the dark.
I tore down
My wall of defense
To let you in
I gave you all
My body, my heart
In hopes it was enough.
Now I feel
My heart breaking,
Shattering in my chest.
Things left unsaid
I feel a chasm opening up
I feel empty
Something is missing.
Now once again
I am left behind
All alone in the dark.
I begin to wonder
Where did I go wrong?
Did I fuck it up again?
What did I do to you
To deserve this bleeding, broken heart?
What did I do
To deserve this never-ending pain?
I let you in
Now I feel lost
You left me behind
Alone in the dark.
