I Just Can't Do It

I just can't do it

I just can't do it
You looking up to a lie
They say fake it till you make it
But can a brother really get that chance
When a brother faking it they say he faking it
When a brother is making it they question his ambition asking if he really deserves it.
When the money comes everyone they say got their hands out
No one wonders how he acquired it
They act merry and are ready to help dispense it
They think I'm going back to my old ways
They think I'm going to fall short someday
I just can't do it.

I remember hitting family up on occasion
Just for advice
Sometimes its just for the feel of having family
I got yelled at
What do I want!
I want nothing but love FAM
Someone to reassure me I'm loved FAM
Someone who I can count on for the truth FAM
Someone I know damn well would not lie FAM.
Someone to give me a hug whispering its alright FAM
Instead am all alone in an aisle with no lights
In the dark, blind as hell trying find the switch
Hitched in chaos cos there's no one to speak to
Do you know how it feels to be alone for over 9 years?
Do you? Do you?
Tell me if you do?
Because I need to know if I can go on or turn around look back and pull y'all to catch on
I just can't do it

I can't do it on my own
I can't, mines all alone
I can't do it without y'all
I can't I can't I can't
I just can't do it

Most of y'all in a daze
Just living life day to day
Just making fun as I aim
Just trying to get in my way
Just trying steal what I say
But I never once stopped and yelled
Cos I just can't do it

I've been running back and forth searching for answers
Helping bums trying to advance one
Helping others mothers with no reward
Yet no ones helping mines
No ones advancing mines
No ones asking if am alright
No ones checking to see if I'm in sight
So why should I check on them
Or am I going to check on them?
I just can't do it

They mad because I appear to be what they didn't envision me to be
I appear to be so far out of reach
They couldn't see
They got a bad line of sight
They can't seem to see what I see
Should I show them?
I just can't do it.©

Morinola Atinsola Moronto™