This is Home

  Do u ever feel like there is a python on your neck and keeps wringing itself around tighter and tighter to the point where you can't breathe? Well that pretty much sums up how I feel right now. An although I would very much like to deny the fact that I'm nervous, the sweat seeping through my shirt pretty makes that nearly impossible. I'm not usually terrified to go in to new foster homes, but this time it's different because this time it's a group home. I've never been in a group home before but I've heard other foster  kids talk about them. 

"Are u going to knock or should I," my social worker, Mrs. Blooming says trying to hide her obvious annoyance. I blink the tears that are threatening to come from my eyes and knock on the door in front of me. A few moments later a women answers. She's plump but not over weight, she has a pretty face that reminds of a china doll. In one arm she's holding a baby, and when I look down I see to my amusement a little boy around the age of five clinging to the women's leg. My social worker looks at me and says, " this is your new foster mother Miss Bridgem."

The women smiles, " Please call me Violet, and you must be Beatrice. So nice meeting you," she extends her hand.

 I except it and reply, " Call my Trixy."  

"Well I'll leave you two to it. Bye Trixy!" My social worker says turning away to leave.

"Come, I'll show you to your room," Violet says to me with a smile. I nod and lift up my duffel bag which was laying on the floor next to me. I walk in and to my surprise I only see one child around the age of ten sitting in the living room watching TV. "We have ten other children staying here, all of them are either in their rooms or out with friends," Violet said nearly echoing my thoughts. Violet leads me up a large wooden stair case. At the top is what seems to be an endless hall way, every inch of it covered in doors. "My bedroom is at the end of the hall. There is one bathroom down stairs and two up here," Violet indicates the two bathroom at either side of the hall, "Now this is your bedroom," Violet opens up one of the doors to reveal a small bedroom. Inside are to beds one of which was already occupied by a girl around my age, 15. She is very pretty and has silky blonde hair that is tied up in a tight ponytail. He eyes are a bright blue and are intensely reading a vogue magazine. "Daisy, I'd like you to meet Trixy she will be your new room mate," Violet says. Daisy looks me up and down then rolls her eyes and turns back to her magazine. Rude much? "She'll warm up to you," Violet whispers in to my ear.

"I hope so," I whisper back. I've had plenty experience with bad room mates and it never ends well. I place my duffel bag next to my bed and sit down. I take another look around the room. There's a bed side table in the middle of Daisy's bed and the empty bed I'll be occupying. The only thing on top is a small lamp, some of Daisy's hair bands, and a silver alarm clock. On the wall is a small wardrobe and next to it is a small closet. On top of my bed is a window with white flowy curtains. The room is hardly decorated other than the small beige rug in the middle of the floor. I don't realize how tired I am until I rest my head on the pillow and I can't help myself from closing my eyes. The next thing I know I'm in a deep sleep. 

                                                                                     ~~~~~

I wake up to the screams of a crying baby. I'm startled and confused at first, but then I remember where I am and want to curl up under the covers again. I look at the clock on the bed side table and see that it's six pm which explains my rumbling stomach. I sigh, get out of bed and head to the bathroom. On my way, I stumble on a toy truck that a child must of left in the middle of the hall. When I look in the bathroom mirror I'm not surprised to see my brown hair the same as it was when my head hit the pillow. One of the pluses in having silky straight hair. 

I look in mirror and sigh at the mascara that has run down my face in the midst of sleep. I wipe a tissue under my brown eyes and suddenly have the urge to cry. I tell myself to take deep breaths. I don't know why I'm feeling this way. I should just suck it up and not be such a little baby, right? I can't help it. All my emotions that I've been holding in for the past two days come bursting out. I cover my hand over my mouth so no one hears me, but I don't stop the tears from coming. Subconsciously I know they will comfort me. I hear some one knock on the door tearing my thoughts away from my tears.

"Someones in here," I say to the door trying as best I can to hide the fact that I've been crying from my voice. 

"I just wanted to let you know that dinner is nearly ready," I hear Violet say from the other side of the door.

"I'll be down in a minute," I answer taking a big gulp of air. I wipe the tears away. When I exit the bathroom I hear the echo of voices from down stairs. I enter the dining room and can't help but stare. Ten kids is a lot more than it sounds.