At first, I thought this pain was all about her, I mean, dahil mahal ko siya kaya ako nasasaktan. Hurt because of thinking about the good times with her that I treasure every hour of my life but noticing after that she didn't even bother discussing or replaying to me about that memories, maybe she put it at the farthest part of her soul. Hurt because of thinking about the future of us even I know will never be real.
But I was wrong, this pain I'm feeling is not about her it's all about me, my life, it's all about emptiness. One day, I just stopped thinking about her, I moved on thinking about her but started to think about 'What if I die?' 'What would happen then?', and everyday, everynight that's what I'm always thinking about and saline will just fall down from the river. I feel worthless, helpless and no one, I'm feeling it every day of my life, so I came up to the conclusion that I am depressed. And the pain I was feeling? I'm loving it, pleasuring it, it feels like I'm a masochist.
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Depression
PoetryDepression is a state of low mood and aversion to activity that can affect a person's thoughts, behavior, feelings and sense of well-being. People with a depressed mood can feel sad, anxious, empty, hopeless, helpless, worthless, guilty, irritable...
