Lakeside

[1] The Board

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Lakeside

As the car parked into its place in front of my cabin, I sat still, staring at the view. The small cabin was always the most comforting place for me to go, until this summer.

"Brielle, I know this is hard for you, but I know you'll have fun. Look on the bright side, we've got new neighbors now. Surely they have a kid somewhere around your age." My mom gave me a small smile, and I returned it weakly.

She didn't realize that for me, having new neighbors wasn't on the bright side. I didn't want new neighbors, I wanted my best friend in the cabin next to mine. If she hadn't died, I wouldn't have to have new neighbors.

I unfolded my arms from across my chest, opening the door to get out of the car. I reluctantly grabbed my bags from the back of the car, each step towards the cabin hesitant. I didn't want to be here, not in the slightest. It brought up memories, and memories of her were bad. They were amazing memories, but bad for me to think about. Already without thinking about her, I wasn't functioning correctly.

I opened the door with a key, entering the house to dust. Not literally, but there was dust everywhere. I began to cough, walking into the small cabin slowly. I turned on the light, and they flickered a bit before turning on all the way.

I turned to look at a window, where two hand prints were painted on the window. One was red, and one was blue. The names Brooklyn and Gabrielle were under each of them, and my mind flashed back to that memory. We were only seven when we placed those on the window.

I knew that reminders of her were all over this house, so I kept walking until I was stepping up the ladder into my room in the attic. It was even dustier up there, and I hadn't realized but there would be even more memories.

Every step I took, I watched the dust from under my feet fly into the air. It amused me, but I was too depressed to find joy in such simple things.

I looked through one of the windows, the one that gave me a beautiful view of the lake. It was calm and blue, with white glares from the rays of sun. It was a beautiful day. It always was beautiful at Lake Bellingham, but I didn't think of it that way. There was a filter now, making it look depressing. But it was only a filter I could see through.

I was so excited to visit the lake this year. I can recall my bubbly tone and excited expressions, actually. A month ago I was telling my best friend, Brooklyn, how excited I was to visit the lake with her again.

And now she's dead.

The next day they found her dead in a bathroom stall, where she hung herself. I have no idea why she would have wanted to commit suicide. She was herself, there was nothing peculiar or different. And don't tell me that she wouldn't tell me because she didn't trust me or something like that, because I knew she would have. I would have sensed her depression, and that's how I know that she wasn't secretly depressed. For some reason that day, June 2nd, she decided to kill herself. After a month of wondering, I still had no idea why.

And if you couldn't already tell, I'm just about dead because of it. It wasn't usually this way at home, but now that I was at the lake, everything was worse. I'd be here for a month and a half, the time I always spend here with Brooklyn's family. Ever since Brooke and I were four, we would come to these cabins every summer, cabin 223 and cabin 224. That's how we met, and she happened to go to my school too. And then we became best friends.

I made numerous memories with her here. It was my most favorite part of the year, and if you asked whether I wanted to go to the lake or Hawaii, I'd pick the lake. But now I wasn't too sure. Seeing reminders of her and our wild adventures wasn't on my radar. I didn't want to be reminded of what she was. I wanted to be left alone, and sulk.