Pen To Paper

I Wish

I Wish
I wish I was the girl who got a full nights rest.
I wish I was the girl who was skinny because she ate right and exercised.
I wish I had both of my parents.
I wish I had long hair.
I wish I was like her.
I wish I was the girl who could spend an hour getting ready.
I wish I was the girl who could take long showers.
"She's skinny because she starves herself"
"She's tired because she spent all night talking to her boy toy"
"Can't your dad come get you?"
"Look at her shoes,"
"Oh my god! You cut your hair!"
I wish I was like her.
But I'm not.
I'm the girl who doesn't eat at school because she tells her mom not to worry about spending five dollars on her.
I am the girl who stays up until four am finishing homework and cleaning the house so her mom can sleep and ace that anatomy final she has the next morning.
I am the girl who cut her hair so her mom can save money on shampoo.
My shoes are torn because I can live without a new pair if it means my sister can have a brand new glove for softball.
No my dad can't come and get me because I am currently babysitting until 2 in the morning on a Wednesday so we can afford his headstone.
I am the girl who finishes her mom's paper in the library so she can sleep for ten minutes.
I am the girl who takes six minute showers so the water bill isn't high.
I am the girl who will stand for hours if it means that the old man can sit down.
Even if that means she will have to take three pain pills so her hips don't give out later.
I am the girl who spends ten minutes getting ready so her siblings have food, and the dogs have water.
I am the girl who leaves the back door open because I know my brother forgot his key.
I wish I was like her.
No I am not anorexic.
Yes, I cut my hair!
No, my dad can't come get me.
Yes! I am tired!
Very,
Very,
Tired!
But let me tell you this.
Before you keep talking.
Yes, I wish I was like her.
I'm not.
I am me.
And that's ten times better than who you are trying to be!