BLADES

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So this is my first story. Updates may be slow but I'll do my best. Excuse any spelling/grammar errors for I'm doing this usually late at night.  Everything will be in Nia's POV unless said otherwise. Enjoy!

NIA'S POV
        And then it happened. The one day that would change everything, forever. The day that would change my life, and it all starts here. With one stupid little object. Blades. Razorblades. Who knew such a simple everyday object could change me into the monster I am today?
     Now my arms are covered in these scars that are a permanent reminder of the life I tried to end but failed time  and time again. Isn't funny how when people think of scars they think of falling off a bike or a dog attack. But not me. I think of scars as long nights when I swear this is the last time. Scars aren't falling off a bike. Scars are these permanent set of marks covering my arms placed every so carelessly.
       In some peoples minds, they are armor. Showing the battle I have won. No. That are a constant reminder of who I was and who I am today. A monster. Thats exactly what I am. Its only because of myself thats I'm this way. I crazy, suicidal, depressed, anxiety filled MONSTER. A huge broken mess nobody can fix. Me, myself. And I. Thats what I am. Shattered into a million pieces way beyond repair. Shattered into pieces that'll never be fully found. And of course as soon as I'm "fixed" it all comes falling crumbling down before my eyes. The most important piece was missing. And it'll never be found. There's nothing left of me but shatters of my former self. They're everywhere. Surrounding the people around me as I'm nothing. As soon as I'm about built up again, it all falls down.  Nothing ever works. I have no idea why everyone keeps trying. They should just give up. Just like I have. Everytime it just gets worse. Everytime I break more and more pieces are missing. Until I'm nothing with no past of myself left. They try to build me up our of thin air, it never works. If it worked, I wouldn't shatter into nothing. I wouldn't be me. I wouldn't be Nia. And most clearly I wouldn't be the monster that scares me as I drift to sleep
So what did you think? Hopefully, all good things. I know, probably boring and/or didnt make sense, but trust me its going to get better. Love all y'all reading this-Emma❤️

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