You Are The Risk I'll Always Take

Chapter 14

Pagkadilat ko ng aking mga mata nakita ko na may nakasaksak sa akin na dextrose. Obviously, I'm in a hospital.

I'm in a room. Maluwang. I can see outside from the window on my left side. Door on my right side. May two chairs na may nakapagitnang maliit na table sa harap ko and may isang parang couch tabi ng door.

Wala akong kasama. Wth. Mag-isa na naman akoooo!

Im playing with my phone until someone opened the door. Nurse pala.

She asked me few questions. Just about how I feel and nothing. Then she left my room.

I was going through my gallery when I found pictures of me and Lance.

Grabe. Ang saya pa namin dito oh!

Mga araw na masaya pa kami.

Biglang nag-flashback yung nangyari last time sa kwarto ko.

Hindi yung pagkasikip ng dibdib ko. Yung away namin ni Lance. Damn. I'm still not over it. Losing a best friend is harder than losing a boyfriend. Charot! Parang may boyfriend naman ako.

I'll admit it was partially my own fault i fed him with lies but I thought letting him go will make it easier for me me to do what I want.

Damn. I was wrong. How can I have what I want when Lance is all that I really want?

But... The damage is done.

Move-on na bobitang Raniella. Selfish ka kasi e. Inuna mo yung gusto mo kesa sa nararamdaman ng iba.

Habang nag-eemote ako may dakilang moment destroyer na bumukas sa pinto.

Ten-tene-neeeeenn!

Ladies and Gentlemen, We proudly present the ultimate moment destroyer...

MAIKEE AYESHA MONTEMAYOR!

Ayan, Bold Letters, Italicized pa plus Underlined pa! Bongga ka bes!

"Omggg! Bes, kamusta ka naaaa?" salubong sa akin ni Maikee na para bang 1 decade kaming di nagkita.

Alien 'to. Alien 'tong babaeng to. Paano ba na-in love yung boyfriend nito dito?

"Okay lang. Maganda pa naman." sagot ko.

"Echosera ka." sabi nito.

Nag-hi lang sa akin si Kyle tapos umupo dun sa upuan sa harap ko. Si Maikee nasa tabi ko.

Nagkukwentuhan kami ni Maikee tungkol sa mga missed shots ni Kyle sa laro nila pagkatapos ay pinagtatawanan namin ang bawat kwento ni Maikee tungkol sa epic fails niya. Hahahahaha.

Akalain mo, napadapa ba naman sa court dahil sa pagpapa-cute kay Maikee? Hahahahaha. Lol.

Hanggang sa nag-open si Maikee ng isang topic na nakuha ang attention ko.

"I saw Lance..." she said.

"H-how is he doing?" tanong ko.

I really want to know how is he. Kahit may conflict between him and me. Best Friend ko parin siya kahit ganito ang sitwasyon namin.

"He's okay..." sa tono ng boses ni Maikee alam kong may mali. "He's having fun with his company." habol pa nito.

"Di ba kayo nagsasama?" tanong ko. May mali talaga e. Well, di ko sure. But i got this feeling.

"Di na e." sagot ni Maikee.

"Why?" tanong ko muli.

"Babe, straight to the point." sabat ni Kyle.

"He's with Mandy. I mean, sila na bes. Is it okay with you?" tanong niya na parang alam niya ang tungkol sa nararamdaman ko kay Lance.

"Oo naman" Oo para sa kaligayahan ng best friend ko. Masaya naman pala siya e. I'm okay with that. As long as he's happy.

#MartyrMuchRaniella

"You loved him." Nagulat ako sa sinabi ng kaibigan ko.

Because of what she said, I was hit by reality.

I loved him but Lance loves Mandy and Mandy Loves Lance. At the end of the day, no one loves me.

Napaluha ako sa dahil dito.

Niyakap ako ni Maikee.

"I loved him." I said.

Ang sinabi kong iyon ang dahilan ng pagkalas ng yakap ni Maikee sa akin.

She smiled at me and I smiled at her back too.

"I knew it." sagot nito.

"How?" tanong ko.

"Best Friend mo ako, duh? I know you more than you know yourself. Parang ikaw kay Lance. You know him more than he knows himself. Sa tingin mo ba, Lance loves Mandy as Mandy loves him?" tanong nito.

"Yes." sagot ko.

Alam kong tama ako sa sagot ko. Kilala ko nga si Lance di ba? Alam kong mahal niya si Mandy. At saka bakit naman hindi magiging mahal ni Lance si Mandy e girlfriend niya nga yung tao e? Right?

"Low gets ka."Natatawang sabi ni Maikee

Ewan ko dito sa babaeng 'to. Taga-ibang planeta nga.

Ang gulong kausap. Nagtatagalog nga, alien dictionary naman ang gamit.

Hindi din nagtagal... Dumating din si Daddy.

Kinamusta niya ako at pinakain ako.

Dumating din yung doctor ko pagkatapos kong kumain. Siguro mga 15 minutes after kong kumain.

"Good Morning!" bati ng Doctor.

Sinalubong ito ni Daddy at nginitian ko lang siya.

"You already ate your breakfast, Raniella?" tanong ng Doctor at tumango lang ako bilang sagot sa tanong niya.

"Okay. Good. So we researched the symptoms you were experiencing. Well, kahapon pa namin ito natapos ngunit ang sabi ng daddy mo gusto niya sabihin ito sa harap mo pagkagising mo for good. Para alam mo, alam niya at natin ang gagawin. Di na ako magpapaligoy-ligoy pa. Raniella, you are suffering Dilated Cardiomyopathy."

"Doc... Noooo! Nooo Doccc! Nooooo. Dilated Cardiomyopathy? Walang ganun doc. Walang sakit ang kaibigan ko! Huhuhuhuhu. Doc... Ano po ba yun?" drama drama ni Maikee.

Iboto po natin si Maikee Montemayor bilang Moment Destroyer of the year and the year after and the year after hanggang forever.

"Dilated (DCM) is a condition in which the 's ability to pump is decreased because the heart's main pumping chamber, the left ventricle, is enlarged and weakened. In some cases, it prevents the heart from relaxing and filling with as it should. Over time, it can affect the other heart chambers."

http://www.webmd.com/heart-disease/guide/dilated-cardiomyopathy

"Raniella, medyo mahina na ang puso mo. You should take care of yourself now. I recommend, reducing sodium in your diet, aerobic exercises can help you too and please don't carry anything heavy." payo ng doctor.

I've known this ever since that day when dad left the house for a meeting. I was cleaning my room when I felt my heart ached. I carried myself to my car and went to the nearest clinic and let myself be checked-up. Nalaman ko na noon. Itinago ko dahil ayokong mag-alala o maging depressed si Daddy. I saw him broke down before when mom left us at ayoko nang mangyari ulit iyon.

Di na ako nagulat sa sinabi ng doctor.

Instead, I smiled and said "Thank you, Doc."

"I'll go ahead." pagpaalam ng doctor sa amin.

My dad hugged me tight.

"Oh.. my princess... Im sorry napabayaan kita. I'm such a bad daddy." sabi nito habang umiiyak.

Kumalas ako sa pagyayakapan namin at hinawakan ang kanyang mga pisngi.

"No. You're not." sagot ko.