The Journey - The College Years [One Direction Fanfic]

16

An hour later Harry wakes up. Anne goes inside the little room to talk to him whilst Des talks to the nurse at the reception. I just sit around with a huge dorky smile on my face. I feel like everything is going to get better now. A few minutes later the doctor rushes inside the room to help Harry get ready. When he leaves the room he has troubles standing on his feet so Anne and Des help him. I walk up to him and kiss him on the cheek before carrying his and my bags. "Let's leave this place" Des says smiling. "Yeah, let's go" Harry mumbles. I want to hug him and kiss him but I know he is tired and sick. Anne hands me the keys to her car and asks me to open the doors. I open the back door first so Harry can get inside before opening the other door for Anne. "Thanks" Anne says and gets in the drivers seat. Des tells us that he'll come to Anne's house with his own car. I sit down next to Harry and give him a questioning look which he answers with a smile. He scoots closer to me and rests his head on my shoulder. The weight of his head and the smell of his curls is so calming and for the first time in my life I feel like someone truly needs me.

"Are you hungry?" Anne asks Harry when we enter the kitchen. He nods. "Why don't you take a shower while I prepare your food?" she suggests. He nods again. I help him on his way to the room and he sits down on the bed whilst I look for fresh clothes in his drawer. "I feel so dizzy" he says. "Do you need help? With showering, I mean" I say and blush. How weird. "Uh, I think so" he stutters and smiles. Such a cheeky boy. That's when I can't hold myself anymore and burst out in laughter which he joins me in. "Wait here, I'll prepare a bath for you, Mr Styles" I tell him smirking. "Okay" he answers, still laughing. I walk to the bathroom and fill the tub with water and add some bathing salts and foamy stuff. By the time I am done preparing everything the bathroom smells like vanilla. I walk back to Harrys room and gasp when I see him standing in front of me with nothing but his boxers on. Normally I would be turned on or something, but right now I am just shocked because of how much weight he lost. I guide him to the bathroom and tell him I'll be right back. "Okay, thanks" he says and is already pulling down his blue boxers. Des is sitting at the kitchen counter and talking to Robin, who just came back home with Lux. It's such an awkward situation, but the two men don't seem to care. "Where is Hawweh?" Lux asks smiling. "Upstairs, he's taking a shower but we can play a game together afterwards" I tell her and she claps her hands. "Lindsay" Anne starts to say while she fills the chicken soup into a little red bowl. "Thank you so much for your help the past few days. You are the best thing that has ever happened to Harry." "No, he is the best that has ever happened to me" I answer smiling and grab the bowl and a spoon to walk back upstairs to Harry.

When I get to the bathroom he is already sitting inside the water. I sit down on the little stool next to the bathtub with the bowl of soup on my lap. "You are the best girlfriend ever" he says and I smile. "I know. Now open your mouth" I demand and start feeding him. He eats all the soup in about five minutes, he must be hella hungry. "Why don't you join me?" he asks smiling. "Cheeky boy" I say and laugh. "Lux wants to see you" I tell him. "I told her that we could play after you're out of the tub, unless you're too exhausted to?" "No, I'm okay." "Harry.. I can't avoid this, I have to talk to you about it" I now start to say. "Why did you do it?" He sighs and his face falls. "It seemed like.. the only option." "It isn't." "I know. I know it, now" he says. He seems honest. "I am going to see a therapist." I feel relieved. He suddenly stands up and steps out of the bath tub. Even though I've seen Harry naked so many times, I still blush every time. He is standing in front of me with water dripping down his torso. I hand him the towel and his boxers. He dries himself and slips into his boxer while I act like I am busy fixing my hair in the mirror just so he doesn't see my cheeks flush. I suddenly feel his hot breath agains my neck and shiver. He places a light kiss on my shoulder and puts his hands on my hips. I turn around and look into his piercing green eyes. He is beautiful. He presses his lips on mine and I answer the kiss by letting his tongue in. I press him against the wall because he still seems a bit dizzy and start kissing his neck and wandering down to his collarbones. I already feel him harden but he interrupts me. "Lux is probably waiting" he growls into my ear and lets go of me. "Yeah" I say and give him a smile.

A few minutes later Harry joins Lux and me in her room. He's wearing grey sweatpants and his black sweater that says 'Teenage Runaway'. I remember him wearing it at Niall's party months ago. God, time flies, I think to myself. "Hawwehhh" Lux screams and runs up to her brother. She attempts to jump into his arms so he can lift her up but he tells her he is exhausted. She nods and sits down on the floor. "I am a singer now" Lux states and looks at Harry. "Just like you." There is so much love and pride in her voice, she adores Harry. "Really? What do you sing?" he asks her interested and she starts to sing some kindergarden which we both don't know. "That was great!" I say when she is finished. "I will sing that song at your wedding!" Lux says and looks at Harry and I. I laugh and look at Harry. He is smiling. "I'm sure that would be the coolest wedding ever" he says and something about the way he says it makes me want to kiss him. In fact, everything about him makes me wanna kiss him. "I'm tired" Lux says after twenty minutes of singing and dancing. "Let's go to bed then" Harry says and brings her to bed while I walk back to his room and sit down on the bed. He comes inside a few minutes later and wanders around the room before sitting down on the floor in front of the mirror. He seems upset and suddenly starts to cry. I immediately stand up and sit down behind him. I don't want to talk because I feel like he is about to say something. I gently start rubbing his back. "Just imagine I would've succeeded" he whispers after five minutes of silence. His words break my heart once again. "I don't want to" I say. "I kept imagining what you would do if I was dead" he sobs. "You would find someone new, someone normal." "Harry" I interrupt him. "Someone who isn't as sick as me. Someone who can give you the love you deserve" he keeps talking and I want to scream and slap him and tell him he is perfect but I would rather know what was on his mind. So I listen, even though it hurts like hell. When he is done listing up all the things he hates about himself his eyes are bloodshot and he looks at me like a puppy. He lies down on the floor and stares at the ceiling. I join him and take his hand. I know that if I speak up, I will cry so I take a deep breath. "I don't know what will make you believe that you are exactly what I want. But I want you to know that as long as you are by my side, I will always be happy. Even if things get tough sometimes, knowing that you love me is what keeps me going. And I want you to think the exact same way. I love you, more than I have ever loved anyone. I want my love to be your savior" I say and squeeze his hand. I know that Harry will always be insecure about himself. I just want him to know that he is perfect to me. He starts playing with my hair and hums a song I don't know. He goes on for about ten minutes until he slowly dozes off. We are still lying on the floor but he seems so peaceful and calm and I don't want to wake him up so I grab two pillows and the blanket from his bed. I cover him up and put the pillow under his head before I do the same and close my eyes. The floor would normally appear as hard as a rock to me but it doesn't. He makes me feel safe and home everywhere.