So here I was lying in a new room belonging to a stranger I'd met maybe an hour ago and I was trying to sleep. Amidst that dark I was trying to close my eyes and dream. Dream good.
But. Would my brain allow it?
Every time I close my eyes, trust me my mind could beat Albert Einstein because it can think of every monera to every Homo sapien. It can think of every ore to every jewel. My mind I tell you ,can think wonders, when I close my eyes.
From my face facing the ceiling to my face facing the window. From the window to door then to the side wall etc etc. I was changing my positions to get that one correct position that would get me my sleep. Every position linked with a new thought.
Position one : why did he leave me?
Position two : was I not worthy of love?
Position three : but he loved me.
Position four : I know he didn't want to leave without me.
Position five : will I ever live again?
Position six : will it ever be life without him again?
Position seven : but I need to live. I'd promised him.
Position eight : I'll do it for him.
Position nine : I'll do it for all the love he once bestowed upon me
Position ten : but without him. Can I?
And before the hurricane in my head resulted in a haemorrhage I opened my eyes and bade my personal Einstein goodbye.
I knew I couldn't sleep this easily. There were so many thoughts dug deep in my mind and heart. I had to let it out.. but to whom?
" If you want anything. Do let me know"
the words echoed in my head.
But she is a girl. I mean she's naive. The most she has experienced by now should be a crush. Will she understand? What if she just drools in the middle of my story. Like it's a bedtime story or something?
My mind was not sure. And it was obvious. My feelings were molten lava eating up the village and she, well ,she was a molecule of that lava.
But something inside me wanted it to be her. And I know that something must be this stupid organ that pumps blood through my body because this very organ is what takes the most stupid decisions.
And when finally my brain gave up and my heart won ,I wore the slippers on the floor and slowly started walking towards the other room. After I reached in front of that room I took one big breath and knocked the door.
Within minutes she opened it. Messy hair, eyes half open, and mouth just about to yawn. She looked at me and said "oh! Hey! Want something?"
And as I stood there staring at her I said "Ears"
She couldn't understand me. I mean think of a stranger walking up to your room midnight and asking for your ears!!!! Sounds like a horror movie, doesn't it? But this ain't no horror movie my friend, so let's get back.
I looked at her puzzled face and said " Let me put it another way. I was thinking if I could talk to you about what's eating me up."
She smiled. And when she did, trust me she looked like an angel. " Can i tell you something? " she said. I nodded.
" From the very moment I saw you there crying I wanted to know the reason. I was soo curious. And I am always this curious. I mean last saturday my best friends were fighting with each other in school. And when I say fighting, they were literally pulling each other's hair in front of the whole school and before I stopped them ,I asked the crowd why they were fighting. I am such a nasty curious child you see" and she giggled.
And me? I stood there listening to her. I was there to share my sorrow and before I could even start she had given me a proper description of her best friends fighting in school. And then I thought to myself "bad idea"
Then suddenly she exclaimed Oh! You wanted to talk right?
Please come in.
I was reluctant. It didn't sound right. And I said "never mind. I feel better. We will talk sometimes later maybe. "
It felt like she read my face because my expressions are way too obvious so she said " No. Please. I insist. Please come in. I promise to be a good listener. " so with a reluctant mind I walked in.
I sat on her bed she joined me too. And she said. Soo. What made you feel so bad? And I said "ummm..." not knowing where to start from. But once the memories came running I knew what to let out.
