BREATHE

Part 1

"Babe you are trying to force everything, she is going to hate me more if you do that. Can't you see it?. I don't want that. I love you but is not fair, she loves you too and you are hurting her. and for what? for me? It is not a good plan and you know it. Don't do that, Not for me.

We deserve better than this shit, but is what we have for now. Life is not perfect. If we want to be happy together we must wait, we must suffer first. and then maybe we can make it together."

-Flashback-

-Lauren-

I was seventeen year old when I met her. We were at the same school but we did not met each other before that day. I took the bus like I always did. The bus stop was a few blocks from my house and I waited almost an hour to catch it. When I walked in, it was full except for one place at the end of the bus. I sat down there. Everyone was playing and yelling like always but not me, I was trying to read a book for my lit class. I should read it earlier but I do not know why I did not. It was pretty a quiet day at school, boring subjects, bad food at the cafeteria and the same stupid people making jokes to everyone who is not in their selective group of jerks.

I was not even a part of any group, I felt invincible almost every day and I spent my time alone, drawing or whatever.

The day passed slowly, when I went out of the school I ran toward the bus but I lost it, like always. So I was forced to walk home. I lived at around 20 blocks from school, it sucks I know. I was walking tired when I passed in front of an small white house with two silly garden gnomes at the front door and then I saw her, sat in the porch with her hands on her face, crying. She was a tiny little girl, she was wearing a soft pink dress with a sash around the waist which emphasized her figure. I walked toward her and I sat beside her, she looked at me and I asked why she was crying. I could notice her ashamed for her movements, then she said, I had a fight with my mom, you don't have to worried about me. This a thing of my everyday life. but I do not know why I wanted to hug her, she looked so fragile and sweet. She was beautiful, with a big brown eyes and long eyelashes, a tiny nose and pink and fleshy lips but not enough to be grotesquely. For me she was totally perfect. I talked with her almost an hour and a half when my phone started to ring loud with a song from my favorite band, uh huh her, and she smiled about it. It was the most flawless smile I've ever saw. I felt stupid for the way I was looking at her. I felt the passing of time slower than usual, it was so late when I realised that mom might be worried about me. so I left her with her perfect smile and I ran to home the faster I could.

I think that when I arrived home my mom yelled at me and curse to the wind but I didn't care at all. I ran to my room and I let myself lay on the bed thinking about her and what she said to me. She was exactly like me. she was alone in this horrible world, and I did not know why, but I felt a connection with that girl with brown skin, a really strange connection. Her name was Camila. She went to the same school as me and we shared a class together but until that day I had never notice her presence in the classroom or in the school.

-Camila-

I've been spent all my time looking at her. "She is flawless" I thought, when she speaks she always has the exacts words to say, no more than the necessary. "She is so smart", she is always reading something. Oh my god if she only knew that she has me in her hands. I can not even fake the way she makes me feel. I am going to fail in this subject because of her, I can not even heard the teacher or the class. I am totally blocked when she is in here.

Everyday I sit at the back of the classroom and I really do nothing. she usually sits three desks in front of me and draw something in her notebook. If with her beauty wasn't enough, she also is an amazing artist. how I know that? well because she has a profile on tumblr, "okay now I look like a stalker" I said to myself, but I do not care, I think I am obsessed with her. Totally obsessed. and It's incredible sad because she does not even see me, I am invincible for her and that hurts.

Finally the school day finished. I hate to go to the school, It is an awful place to go. All the students has a group to belong, but not me. I am always alone, I lunch alone and I spend my time writing, that is the only thing I like to do. I am in home now and it is not better that school, here my mom is always complaining about something that I've really never paid attention, my dad is always angry and nobody notice me like always, I am nothing more than garbage for them.

So as I always do, today I got into the kitchen I grabbed my food and went to my room to eat, but somebody stopped me, my mom, yes.. my mom had a problem with my presence here so she started to yell at me, I think it's her favourite hobbie these days, then as always she said that I do not worth to be there, that I am the worst human being in the whole world and that I do not deserve the food she made. I supported as much as I could but, I couldn't conteine myself, I ran outside the house and I sat in the front porch crying, crying like I always do. Feeling so stupid.

I was crying so hard when I felt someone sitting at my side, I looked up with my eyes covered on tears and I saw her. Those incredible emerald eyes were looking at me, and she smiled. I felt my heart melting, I was surprised, then she asked 'why are you crying?, I was afraid but I felt so secure with her at my side that I told her all the story behind my tears, when I finished I was completely ashamed of my life. She was staring at me, then she said something so sweet, ' you are not garbage, you are beautiful and intelligent, you don't have to be ashamed of being you. You are perfect just as you are. Do you believe me? you have to, because I know everything, she said laughing with and stupid gesture on her face. she made me laugh for a moment and then almost an hour and a half later her phone rang loudly. It was her mom worried about her, then in less than a minute, she gave me a little kiss in my cheek and ran away to her home.

Everything changed since that day. I did not know at that moment she was going to change my life with her silly smile and her hypnotic eyes.

" I need to go out of this, you know how it is here. They never would accept us. Please love, you have to understand why I did that, I did it because I love you and you know it ! please do not be mad with me! your words are hurting me! please stop! I did it for you ! I do not want to force anything, It just I can not be like this my whole life, I miss you everyday, I miss your smile, I miss the way you look at me, I miss your smell. Please understand ! I am yours ! "