Chapter 1
I crashed down on my bed, sobbing, and letting go all of my worries and hatred of myself. I'm ugly, if you look at me. I have straight, thin, blondish brown hair, green eyes, thin lips. I'm about 5'4 and I have an O.K figure. I have fair skin, the color of snow. My mother tells me that I'm pretty, but seriously, what kind of teenager listens to their parents? I have a very misshaped face, people at school call me "Butter face." I got up off the bed and looked in the mirror, roaming over my red puffy eyes, my ugly face, and my black tank top and blue sweats from old navy. My hair up in a messy pony tail.
I run into my bathroom, closing the door and start a hot bath, turning on the valve for the water to run. I strip off my cloths as I open a drawer and took an object that I had just touched yesterday. I looked at myself in the mirror one last time before I stepped into the bath of steaming water. Thoughts of disappointment and nervousness. I brought the object down to my wrist and started running it along my wrist, wincing in pain as I close my eyes. I stop quick, as I look down to my wrist bleeding, then look down at the water to see my reflection. I see the pain in my eyes, the quivering in my lips as my wrist is stinging. What am I doing to myself, I thought.
I jumped as I heard a buzzing noise and look over to my phone to see my mom calling. I pick it up and breath out, trying not to sound in pain. "Hello?" I said, looking down sadly at my wrist, watching the blood drip in the water and spread all around me. "Hi honey, it's your mom!" She sounded in a hurry. "Oh. Whe-" She interrupted me and went on, "Hope, I'm not going to be home tonight, I have to be in a meeting, so you'll be by yourself." As always... "Oh..." "Are you ok with that?" I roll my eyes and say, "Yea-" "Look honey sorry I got to go, goodnight" I close my eyes, holding in my anger, "Good night love-" the line went dead. "you."I got out of the bath, letting the water drain from the bath, and put away the sharp object. I got a cloth and put a bit of water on it and lightly patted my skin, wincing when I felt the cloth touch my cut.
Flashback:
Hope walked down the hallway, her vans standing out, next to the stilettos that every girl that goes to West Way High wear, every girl except for Hope. One of the most popular girls came up to Hope and started screaming, "Ahhhh! Oh jeez Hope! You scared me! Oh are you in your halloween costume early?" Hope ignored her and kept walking, looking down at the ground as she was walking to her next class, art.
As she opened the door to the art room, she saw groups of students talking. Once they saw her, they started whispering and laughing, one girl, named Rachel, came up to her and poured blue paint all over her and laughed and said, "Awwww! Hope why are you so blue?"
The art teacher, Mrs. Bloom, said, "Rachel, what are you doing?!?" Rachel smiled innocently, "Oh sorry! I was trying to make art, but now I think I should throw it out, since its very crappy!" I looked down, about to burst in tears.
Mrs. Bloom said, "RACHEL, DETENTION!!!!!!"
End of Flashback.....
I got on my pajamas that consisted of purple baggy pajama bottoms, and a, "My Mama Says I'm Special" T-shirt from, "Bubba Gumps."
I laid down in my bed, ashamed for what I had done to myself.
I drifted off to sleep, thinking about what will happen to me...
