Broken Smiles

•*Chapter one*•

          Great, another day at school. I walk in the large, dark, vague doors. Not even one step in the building yet, I hear people whispering, "look it's her." "where do you think she gets her clothes?" "Haha probably Goodwill." They say "Do you see all the scars on her arms?" Closing my eyes, I start to think, why am I here? Why do I dread to arrive everyday but still come here, to this dungeon? But then I start to open my eyes and I realized why I came. I realized why I come everyday. Five days a week and sometimes come for remediation on Saturdays. It's all for him. Derek. Of course he doesn't know I like him. I try to take my mind off him as I walk in the school, Brookville High.  As I walk in I hear more murmurs. "How much does she even eat? Probably two hundred pounds a day." The kid walks up to me.

"Hey fatty how much do you eat? Two hundred pounds a day?"

"I don't eat."

"Yeah right stop lying, we all know you eat a lot. Your so fat the only people that like you are the lonely horny savages running around trying to have sex. You're gonna get that two inch punisher from somebody."

I run to the bathroom, crying. While students stand against the lockers laughing at me. I wipe my face off, I open my book bag and look at the razors, pins, needles and knives. I close my eyes and bag and think about my weight and Derek. While I only weigh one hundred and eighty pounds, Derek likes "thick" girls. So I start to think about Derek. Derek's a handsome guy. He is tall and has hazel eyes like caramel apples, like the ones from the candy shops. He always wears this black and red hoodie. It says, *were still living*, I'd love to steal it and wear it everyday. Especially to hide scars and burn marks. He smells like fuck boy but he looks like Mr.Loyal. His eyebrows are thick and his lips are fluffy. He has a cute nose and wonderful brown hair id absolutely love to play with. The bell rings and I'm suddenly shocked. I run out of the bathroom looking down, When I run into somebody.

"Damn I'm sorry."

I look up, it's Derek. "Sorry, sorry I just.."

"It's okay, I didn't mean too. Are you ok?" He picks up my books "I'm sorry. Aren't you Mira?"

"Yeah and I'm fine thanks." I pick up the rest of my books and rush off.

I walk in late to my first class. As I open the door everyone glares and laughs at me.

"Where's your pass? You're late."

"I don't have a pass"

"Sit down and we will talk after I give the class instructions."

I quietly walk to my seat when suddenly I bump into a desk.

"Gosh watch where the hell your going"

"Sorry I didn't mean.."

"Whatever go away bastard."

I walk away and I sit down in my seat. I look around and start to think about Derek when Mrs. Seize started to say instructions.

"Good morning class, We are studying in the work books today. Please open to.."

I put my hand on my forehead and start to doze off. I start to get drowned in thoughts and I fall asleep while the rest of the class works.

*

The bell rings and I wake up.

"Mira, see me please."

I dread walking to the front desk. I look at her and confront her. She hands me a paper and says, "Alright now, go to class before you are late!"

I walk into the hallway and I rip the staple out of the paper that folded it in half. I open it. The paper is labeled, TIMEOUT. I rip it up and toss it in the trash.

I walk to my next class. My favorite class, Math. There is also a bonus, seeing Derek. As I am walking to the door of my next class, I overhear a conversation.

"Do you think they really have a chance together?"

"Hell no. He's mine and she'll never get him anyway."

I feel like there talking about Derek and I. I don't want to tell him that like him but at the same time he is the only one who I've ever liked. I always think about him when I wake up and when I go to bed.

"Move already, you've been standing there for five minutes. Get in your class whore."

I walk into class sort of crying. People call me names like whore, slut, bitch, cocksucker, fat, and everyone's favorite, big round potato. I start to get drowned in thoughts as I walk in. I take a seat, across the room from Derek. I lay my head down in my arms. I think about math and doing work to try and impress Derek. I raise my head to see him. He's coming through the door. I don't know whether to wave or stay silent. Since he walked to his seat and didn't look at me or anyone else, I Put my head back down. The soft sound of the air vents start to get louder as they turn on. it gets colder and I start to shiver. I start to get drowned in thoughts again. I think about how lifes sucks without Derek. I start to doze off as I think about the sick ass world. I also start to think about Derek again. Questions pop up in my head. Does he know? Why would he like you? You're just a plain, stupid, ass bitch. I start to cry in my arms and fall asleep two minutes later. I wake up to the nudging of someone poking my shoulder.

"Hey, are you okay?"

Fuck, Its Derek. "Yeah everything's fine."

"Do you want to be partners? Were doing a project. I think you were sleeping when she gave instructions."

"No sorry. I'd rather work alone, thanks." Fuck what did I just do. Fuck fuck fuck. " We can still be partners though. Since you asked."

"Uhm okay?"

"Sorry I'm just confused about the project." Even though I was just still sad and depressed and kind of embarrassed from Derek looking right at me trying to be my partner.

"Okay, ill tell you. Is it true?"

"Huh? What are you talking about?"

" I, I heard you like me."

"No, no, no, no, I don't sorry. Who told you that. I don't like you at all. I mean I do."

A/N- STILL NOT FINISHED. Chapter one still has to have a lot of work on it. Don't judge u little shits.