My name is Julio Pepito IV, and this is my story.
I was just little boy, living in Mexico.
My mother was a Taco Bell manager.
My father was working in the lawn-mowing business.
I was happy, until the they attacked.
The broke down wall Mother Russia.
I heard the wreckage when I was at school.
The teachers were yelling, so I told them to shut up.
They told me to go the time-out chair.
There was no time-out chair.
In the blink of an eye, Grumpy Cat bursted through our roof.
It ate my teacher.
I cried.
When I finished crying, I ran out of my school, which was demolished, and went to see if my house was destroyed.
As I was exiting through the obliterated school lawn-mower parking lot, I felt my mom's chancleta hit my face.
I realized my mom has trying to tell me something using chancleta code.
Then another 6 chancletas hit my face.
She was telling me to go to Taco Bell, she must be hiding in her manager office!
As I ran to the Taco Bell, a giant troll face threw a huge "ALT + F4" sign at me.
I thought I was going to die, but out of no where, my huge flying invincible fire-breathing golden rooster broke the sign in half, I was saved!
I hurried to my mama's Taco Bell.
The thing is, there was no Taco Bell.
Only McDonalds.
I thought to myself "my mama must've been captured by Ronald McDonalds himself".
I ran into the McDonalds.
But it was a trap.
Three extremely masculine men were waiting at the cash registers for me.
They grabbed hold of me and took me to the back.
Inside the back room was a huge blood-covered machine with saws and grinders on it.
The men told me it was used to turn people into chicken nuggets.
Next to the machine was another door.
They threw me to the door and opened it, revealing a huge prison inside the McDonalds.
There must've been thousands of prisoners inside the cells.
The trio grabbed me by my legs and hurled me across the prison, were a robot caught me and put me in a cell.
I was knocked out after the fall, but all I remembered seeing was the numbers "305" on the cell door.
Even though I was just knocked out, I could still tell ...
That a war was just started.
